Lady Luck
by icequeenkitty
Summary: When Shera Olsen came to work on the Shinra no. 26 she got more than she ever imagined. Cid Highwind, the events of FFVII, and the story of a woman, told from her own eyes. Rated M for Cid's cussin.
1. Chapter 1

A few requests:

**If you are not a SheraXCid fan, please do not tell me**. If you don't like the pairing there are plenty of other fics to read.

Please do not get all technical about things on me. I am not a mechanic or an engineer, so some of the lingo may sound off or redundant. This goes for characters as well, I tried my best to capture the essence of them but when I don't have a scene from the game to write from I can only use what comes from my head.

Thirdly some information may seem off but I did do my homework instead of making up a whole bunch of history. However, I cannot tell a story with out liberties so take it as is and I will greatly appreciate it.

Also each chapter is to be nine pages and this is the first of five chapters.

Thank you. And pleasant reading.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

-------------------------------------------------------------------

**Lady Luck**

Chapter one

My name is Shera Olsen, and I'm afraid that my life is not nearly as exciting as others, but I feel that it bears being recorded. Up to this point I have seen and done things that I both cherish and regret with each breath. Allow me to start where I should... the beginning.

I was raised in Kalm, a small town on the outer skirts of Midgar, the monstrous city where the Shinra company's main base is located. Back when I was a child they were still a weapon development company, they were still super powerful but had "Works" tagged on the end of Shinra. I grew up an only girl of my parents, Lia and Jonas. My father was a mechanic and often employed me and my two older brothers to help him in his business. Much to my mother's feminine dismay, I took to it like a fish to water. I was quickly absorbed by any kind of engine I could get a peek at over my wide glasses. I tried to help my father long after my brothers had lost interest. I truly admired his patience with my constant questions and equally consistent presence. I barely noticed the children around me growing out of childhood into their teens, girls fawning over boys and boys gunning after girls. I would barely notice them over the top of my latest book on the newest wonders of electronic devices. It would even take a while until I noticed that I had changed as well. Now, I've never been a "looker" as my dad would say, but I am not an eyesore either. My brown hair tended to get matted with the oil and grease that I looked forward to wallowing in, and my outfits were also most at home in my father's garage. But regardless of my messy appearance I was beginning to become rather pretty, if I do say so myself.

I wasn't the only one who noticed, while I didn't get too much attention, there were a few boys that confidently strode into the garage and requested a tune up of a different nature. Boys. Maybe I should have taken at least one of them up on their more humble offers of dates, but I was far too busy in my own little knowledge thirsty mind. By the time I was sixteen I had surpassed my father in skill and understanding of not only the vehicles he worked on regularly but others that I had never even seen! I can honestly say he wasn't very pleased by this, and I guess I can understand why. He was very much in the mind set that it was a dirty job, a man's job, and prided himself on being the best mechanic in town. Now he was second to his fair skinned sixteen year old daughter. My mother was equally "thrilled" with my talent as well. Though she had given up hope of me marrying young and popping out grandchildren by the time I was eight, my fascination with my father's work was something she never came to terms with. Even to this day, though she may not be as vocal about it, she still lets me know in her silent way that she would rather have me be a house wife with no ambition.

It was clear to me by the age of seventeen there was nothing else to gain by staying in Kalm. I had read up about Shinra's programs and felt my future would be found in their ranks. After some careful planning, doing any odd job I could, and serious penny pinching I set off for Midgar. My parents were adamant in their disapproval, but the call of the world was too loud to ignore. I arrived at the Shinra headquarters and was met with less resistance than I expected. Actually I just had to mention I was interested in becoming an engineer for them and they practically swept me off to the barracks. I learned a lot in that building. I was commended on my skill but constantly reprimanded on second guessing myself and my constant recalculations. I was by no means the brightest engineer to grace their company but, I was not at the bottom of their list either. I spent years there, over looking and aiding in the construction of some of those wonderful machines I had read about. It was when I was twenty five when my life would take a change.

I'll always remember the day I met Mr. Palmer for the first time. I knew the company had begun a Space program, and had been devouring any source of information of it's workings that came my way. The company was currently involved in a full out war with a foreign land named Wutai, and were eager to get the upper hand any possible way. They, of course, wanted to explore the vast unknown but the possibility of having access to a tried and true rocket engine would certainly give them an edge on our own planet as well. The man that approached me was far from what I had envisioned the well respected Palmer to look like. He was balding and rather fat, he was smart but his intelligence was hindered with oafishness. He launched into a speech he had most likely given to many engineers before me, but my joy was not tarnished by the fact that he didn't take a personal shine to me. I, Shera Olsen, was offered a position on the Space Exploration team.

His watery eyes almost bugged out of his head when I agreed enthusiastically and hugged him. Chances were he had only noticed I was a woman when I spoke, not that I can blame him really. Compared to Ms. Scarlet, the gorgeous head of Shinra's weapon development division, I was about as attractive as a bowl of rusted wing nuts. But I didn't care, I was in. I got to get out of the city and travel to another continent. I had only a few days to prepare for my relocation but I was ready by then end of that evening, the days of waiting were torturous.

The day did come soon however, and I was the only passenger on a gigantic aircraft carrier. I was eventually told, only after I pestered the pilot relentlessly, that they were picking up a vehicle as well as dropping me off. While in transport in the massive aircraft I was given a stack of reports to read and was left to myself. I began reading the research of the man who I would be replacing. He went into great detail of the location and the numerous failed shuttles. He was an older man and his notes clearly conveyed this, he was not at all prepared to think as I had trained myself too, logically and unbiased. I began running possibilities of the causes of each failure through my head, and found after a bit of analysis that I had a 97 chance of being correct in most cases. After needlessly distracting myself continually, I came across a new section addressed to me. Well, not me per se but his "replacement". Here he described the man I would be working for. As I stated before the researcher had been an older gentleman and held a certain air of arrogance of many things. I began to feel the horror wash over me as my senior warned me of the young man who he believed would drag the Shinra name through the mud. He described the "Captain" as a reckless, foul mouthed, unorthodox, hooligan, that belonged in a day care center. I began to doubt my decision to leave the Shinra building, I wanted to tinker with something, tinkering always eases my nerves. I started painting grim pictures for myself, of a great bulbous man with green teeth and a mean streak a mile wide. I had always kept to myself at the head quarters and no one really bothered me, but this team was small and I was suddenly aware that if I didn't like them, there would be nothing I could do.

I read on. The picture twisted grimmer and grimmer. I was almost expecting a behemoth to be waiting for me at the base. It was when I read his name that my heart stopped for the first time. Cid Highwind. I was familiar with his work. In fact I had helped construct a few of his creations, what wonderful crafts those were. And I had heard from a bit of eaves dropping that he was in charge of a top secret project that would change the world of travel and transport. I couldn't imagine that the man who's blueprints made me smile with their brilliance would be the beast this old man would lead me to believe. Before I had a chance to wonder about the strange palpitations of my heart the transport craft landed smoothly at our destination. I quickly tucked away the file in my lab coat and tried to fight off the urge to run. The pilot informed me pleasantly that we had arrived and I heard a loud clank and felt the plane lurch ever so slightly to the side. A new voice paraded through the open window of the cockpit.

"What the hell are you doin' ya goddamn idiot! Look at what you jack asses are doing to this plane! The way your treatin her I wouldn't be surprised if she fucking blew out on your way back! I'll be like a pig in shit if ya let me fix her up for ya! Unless you wanna operate her from the bottom of that blasted ocean?"

I found myself cringing with the language the man used, but felt a smile creep over my face at the unmasked enthusiasm in his voice. This man loved being an engineer as much as I did. Judging by the teetering of the craft and the echo of his voice I believed he had leapt up and was hanging in through the cockpit's window. Which seemed impossible, this was an aircraft designed to transport other aircrafts, no one could jump that high... could they? I didn't have a chance to inspect the speaker as the hatch before me opened and a few scraggly men served as a welcome party for me. The one was unremarkable but the other was rather stocky and had a fixed scowl on his middle aged face. His beady black eyes scanned me and silently spoke the disgust of my gender. Given the information I had received I assumed this horrible man was the "Captain". My dread set in.

"H..hello." Was all I could muster.

The two men looked at me rather cautiously as I clumsily got out of the plane. I heard the pilot laugh from inside and wanted nothing more than to run back in . I wished they would say something... they just stared at me.

"Ain't I taught you ingrates anything! Say hello to the lady!" Shouted the voice from earlier. I turned my head to see a brief glimpse of a young man walk around the front of the plane.

"Hi." The two men said in defeated unison.

"You look tired, has the project been taxing lately?" I never was a good conversationalist.

"No." Sighed the unimposing man. "But the Captain has been."

My eyes must have widened in shock, because they both looked at me like I had been transformed into a toad. I couldn't believe that he would speak about his leading officer like that when he stood right next to him! But the man I had dubbed the Captain shared the same confusion of his comrade.

"You there, girl!" Came the gruff voice from the tail of the plane this time.

"Yes?" I shouted politely in response.

"You wanna prove to them why you should be out here?"

"Excuse me?" I was horribly reminded of the boys of Kalm making me offers I had to refuse.

"You go ahead and tell them what engine this beauty runs off of."

" Oil-cooling RG24-f type horizontal-facing 24 cylinder engine x4 with an ascending output of 8,240 horsepower." I rattled off the statistics confidently, because I had checked them three times before I embarked on the vessel.

There was a laugh. A laugh of genuine amusement and I felt so proud to have made this interesting man's point. When I returned my gaze to the men before me they were staring at me with their mouths hanging open. I furrowed my eye brows at the Captain in hurt puzzlement.

"Surely you must have known that I would know that sir? Why else would you agree to have me stationed here?"

Again they stared at me. There was movement to my right and the laugh came again.

"Shit, they didn't want ya here! I did!"

Now I am not by nature superstitious or a hopeless romantic. I thought the idea of soul mates was ridiculous, that true love was meant for story book characters. I knew for a fact that a little cherub did not fly around unloading arrows into people's hearts without medical repercussions, and I certainly thought that love at first sight was just an author's cheap trick of getting out of writing a courting scene. So how shocked was I when the handsome blonde man with burning blue eyes instantly stole my heart with his crooked cigarette laden smile? Completely. He had to be about twenty eight, and was breath taking. He wasn't a balding, bulbous mass of sneering evil, he was well toned, had a strong chin, and I was fascinated with him immediately. It took me a few minutes to regain my power of speech. He was almost next to me when I finally forced the words through my tight throat.

"You did?"

"Damn right! I heard about you through the grape vine lil' miss, and I'll be damned if I thought anyone would ever be able to make heads or tails of those blue prints I scribbled up. But here you are!" His blue eyes took me in with a silent smile, I wanted to drown in those eyes.

My brain was moving in slow motion, the words rolling over me and crashing into a pile for my head to sort out after it was done taking him in. He was close now and I could see that his dusty blonde hair was short and stuck up on his head, he held the front of it up with a pair of aviation goggles. His face was cut at pleasing angles and he sported a bit of scruff obtained by neglecting to shave for a few days. He had on blue shirt that fit him rather snugly and I could see he kept himself in excellent physical form. He wore a deep green pair of cargo pants and dark brown leather gloves. It was after my inspection of him that I finally realized what he said.

"Y..you're Cid Highwind?" I stammered, being completely flustered.

"One and the same. You can call me 'Captain' though, everyone does." He must have seen my surprise because he raised an eyebrow at me. "Not what you expected huh?"

"N..no. It's just I didn't imagine you..." I cut myself off before I said something that would make working for this marvel uncomfortable. I tried desperately to think of something to say, it was then my eyes fell on the pack of cigarettes tucked neatly under the strap of his goggles on the left side of his face. He traced my gaze and put a hand on the smokes.

"Being a smoker? Ah well, I know I can't smoke when I'm in Ms. 26, so I gotta make up for the time I'll be loosin'." He shrugged.

"Ms. 26?" I asked still a bit dazed from the somersaulting of my poor heart.

He motioned in front of me with a flair of sarcasm. There among the trees, beyond the small barracks, stood a half constructed, looming, space shuttle. I couldn't believe how enormous it was, it nearly took my breath away just looking at it. A smell I had come to love deeper than any fragrance since I was a child unexpectedly washed over me, the smell of oil and a hint of perspiration. I felt him put a friendly hand on my shoulder and a dash of crisp smelling cologne mixed with the already intoxicating scent, started my head spinning.

"Beautiful ain't she?"

I looked at him and found his eyes locked lovingly on the skeleton of what would hopefully be the first manned shuttle into space. He didn't say it then, but I could tell from just how he stared at the rocket that this was his dream. I foolishly wondered if he could ever look at me that way, which quickly made my face turn red. Thankfully, he was too wrapped up in his rocket and didn't notice my rosy cheeks.

"Yes, it's a real honor to be able to work with such a nice rocket."

"Ya hear that you shit heads? AN HONOR!" He snarled at the two men who seemed to shrink at his wrath, I was rather startled myself.

"Are you gentlemen on the project as well?" I asked them civilly, Cid's hand still rested on my shoulder and I could feel my skin tingle.

"These fuck heads? No way! Shinra just sent them out here so I could train them to fly the new craft I've been workin' on. Top notch stuff. Now they're all prepared and ready to scurry back to their safe little building. They've done nothing but fuckin' complain the whole time they've been here." That was the first time I had heard the Shinra building referred to as 'little'. I felt a bit guilty, but I was glad these unfriendly men were not going to be around much longer.

"Are you really going to work on the Gelnika Captain, or can we go?" Grumbled the stocky scowling man.

"Keep yer damn pants on Riley I'll fix the flyin' deathtrap! Be ready to depart in about twenty minutes..." He patted my shoulder lightly and I was lost in his blue eyes again. "Olsen you can go ahead and get yourself situated at the base. Just tell them who ya are and they'll show you where you'll be stayin'."

"Yes Captain."

As I walked on into the small patch of trees that partially hid the small group of buildings the Captain referred to as the base, I tried my hardest not to look back. I had never felt like this before, I was terrified and excited. I wanted to turn and watch him, wanted to see if he was really still there, that they weren't playing some joke on me, wanted to see if he looked any less handsome from so far away. I held my curiosity to myself and pushed on through the low branches.

I found a fellow worker, introduced myself, and he immediately greeted me with a warm handshake.

"Well well they finally twisted someone's arm into replacing old grouchy Roper eh? Glad to have you aboard Shera. I'm Donnie by the way, and you're gonna love it here. Come on I'll show you to your room." He opened a door on one of the cozy little buildings and led me down the narrow path, opening doors and introducing me to the rest of the crew as we went. There weren't many of us, maybe thirty one in total. All of them gave me a pleasant smile and I was so relieved that they seemed at ease and happy here. Even though I know it's ridiculous I took a count of how many female workers there were. I counted seven, eight including myself. I was not the most attractive of the lot either, which was again a ridiculous observation, but it made me a bit anxious. Donnie led me further down the hall and talked to me over his shoulder. "Everyone here is real great, we'll look after ya so don't worry about getting overwhelmed or lost or anything. You're one of us now, the Captain put you on the list of candidates personally, so we know you'll work out just fine here. You're going to love the Captain." My face twinged red again awkwardly. I knew that he hadn't meant that literally but, was that what I just felt being with him? "He's a great guy, he gets carried away some times but he's got a heart of gold under all that bark. Have you met the Captain yet?"

"Yes, he and I met at the Gelnika. I really am having a hard time believing that the infamous Cid Highwind is so... young."

"Where you expecting an other Palmer?" Laughed Donnie as he opened the last door in the building and waved me into my new quarters.

"I guess I was." The room had a bed, a window over looking the forest and a big wooden desk with a lamp on it.

"Well luckily for all of us, Palmer is one of a kind. Well I'm sure you want to unpack and get settled in. So if you need anything don't hesitate to ask anyone, it was nice meeting you Shera and I'll be seeing you around!" With that I was alone.

I don't really have too much that I hang onto. I have a good amount of jumpsuits already broken in with spots of oil and grease, some casual tanks tops and jeans, but I suddenly wished I had bought a nice outfit before I left Midgar. Which was completely wrong of me, I didn't come here to act like some love sick puppy. Plus, I'm sure he didn't feel the same way about me and who was to say he wasn't wearing wedding ring under those heavy gloves? I pushed all those silly emotions out of my head as I set to work making this room my own. I moved the bed around and had a hard time getting the desk to budge at all, it was heavier than it looked. By the time I was satisfied with the layout I was tired and sweaty. The sun was setting outside and I was ready to break in my new bed by sleeping a good eight hours. I had hung my lab coat on a hook by the door and was currently in a tank top and loose fitting slacks, I could feel the sweat dribbling down the back of my neck. I let out an accomplished sigh and heard a sharp rapping at the door. I mopped up my brow and opened the door and felt my stomach hit the floor.

"Evenin' I see your all moved in eh?" Cid stood out side my door his lips free of cigarettes and a large spear rested nonchalantly across his shoulders. He waited a moment for a response, I had forgotten how to speak again.

"Grbleb." Was all I managed to get out. He didn't seem to mind or notice.

"Well I know you're probably bushed but did ya want me to show ya around real quick?"

I grabbed my lab coat which had a secret mission to make me look like an even bigger fool by tangling itself up. I stood there under his patient gaze trying to find the appropriate sleeve for each arm. I felt like it took me an eternity to get into my coat properly even though it was more realistically only a few seconds. Would he think I was an idiot? Would he tell me to get on the next ship out of here? When I smoothed down the unnaturally difficult sleeves I saw he wasn't even looking at me, he absently wiped his nose and stared off down the hall. I didn't know if I was grateful or insulted. I took his distraction to eye the spear, it was well crafted and very menacing, he probably made it himself. It did have that Highwind look to it, but why did he need it?

"I'm ready when you are Captain." I was beginning to become annoyed at how uninterested he was in me. Was Kady, the raven haired mechanic five doors down, in the hall? He didn't take his eyes off of whatever had drawn his attention.

"Just a sec." He removed himself from my doorway and started down the long hallway.

Was it Selena the blonde from seven doors down on the right? I leaned out into the hall and saw him crouch down next to a person who was sadly sitting on the floor, their face buried into their knees. When I squinted I recognized the man Donnie had introduced me to as Nick. It was clear from his body language that whatever was bothering him was nothing to scoff at. I watched as the Captain spoke to him, I was too far away to hear what he was saying, but I could see how carefully he talked to him. What was it that Donnie had said, oh yes, under all that bark he's got a heart of gold. Cid said something and Nick let out a laugh, I felt a smile on my face too.

"Go on and get outta my sight before I gotta crack your fool head in." Cid stood and shifted the spear off of his shoulders. Nick stood and gave him a weak smile.

"Aye aye Captain." The lanky man moved on down the hall and entered his room, the grief no longer incapacitating him.

Cid turned to me again and put an impatient hand on his hip.

"I haven't got all night, god dammit."

"S..sorry!" I scrambled the rest of the way out of my room and met him in the passage.

There was a distance in the anger he feigned. I hadn't known him long at all but I was clever enough to see that he didn't like people to think of him as soft, and emotional. I wasn't even sure if I was entirely right, but judging about how he cursed constantly and shouted so often, I think I was pretty close. Now he was determined to put on the tough act again so that the new recruit wouldn't find him out, or maybe he knew I had a clue and wanted to be mean to cover his tracks. So he slung the weapon back onto his right shoulder, turned, and walked out of the building, leaving me to trot after him without a word.

The night air was cool and I was glad I put on my lab coat, not that it kept me toasty warm, but I wasn't shivering. There wasn't a single cloud in the sky and for the first time in years I could see the stars. It was so beautiful, like someone grabbed a ladder and secured millions of little light bulbs into a satin sky. The moon hung over the base, the rocket's structure etched against the brilliant white sphere, like it was coming to see what we were going to be jettisoning up at it in a few months time. The woods were full of the chirping of crickets and other happy critters, as the canopy swayed lazily in the light breeze. I almost walked into him, unaware that he had stopped.

"Don't get all distracted now." He pointed at a building a couple hundred feet from where my room was. "That's the Medical ward and rec room." His finger glided to a closer structure. "That there's the cafeteria." He pointed to a structure hidden in the dark shadows of the trees and night. "That's the formal conference hall, we don't use it really. Just when the big shots from Midgar grace us with their presence. We normally just hang out around the pool table and play a few games, you good at pool?"

"I'm good at geometry." I offered with a smile. His eyes tried to decide if that meant I could kick his ass or if I was terrible.

"Why am I not surprised?" The right side of his mouth curled into a half smile and I felt the strange flutter in my heart again. "Okay, so what else? Oh, the supply shed is behind the conference hall. Ya can find anything you need there, and next to that is the garage."

"Garage?" I asked eagerly.

"Yup, got some pet projects brewin in there right now, but the place is huge so you're welcome to do what ya please. Just don't go touching my babies."

"May I see them?"

"Now?" He took a cigarette out of the pack on his head and placed it in his mouth.

"If you don't mind?" I watched the match spark into life and the flames illuminate his face in it's dancing light.

"Maybe tomorrow Olsen, I don't feel much like having people praise me at the moment." His eyes drifted to the woods where they stared in unreadable thought for a moment.

"Um, Captain, can I ask you a favor?" I breathed, the smoke curling around my face.

"Shit you've only been here a couple hours and you're all ready wantin' favors?" He grimaced not taking his eyes off the patch of grass.

"I'm sorry. It's nothing." I said feeling a bit foolish. He sighed and the air was filled with a stream of smoke.

"Whaddya want?" He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye.

"I..it's just... would you mind very much if... would you please call me by my first name?"

"Doncha like your last name?"

"Not as much as my first name, but I understand sir." His unblinking eyes shifted off me and I wished I hadn't said anything.

"Any more questions or requests?" He took a long drag from his cigarette.

"A few, actually."

"Well pick one."

I fought back the urge to ask him if he had a wife, or a girlfriend, because they were stupid questions that I was embarrassed to even think about. The moonlight caught the metal of his spear and it shone in my eyes.

"Why do you have that spear?" I asked, feeling that was a good question.

His response was another finger point.

"Them."

My eyes searched for what he was aiming at and I can honestly say it took me a whole of two seconds to understand. There was a flash of red wings and I saw the creatures moving soundlessly through the trees. I know I made some kind of feeble noise but I was too involved in trying to make them out to be completely frightened. From what the moon and shadows allowed me to see they appeared to be a type of dragon. They were a bit bigger than a man, the majority of their scaley bodies were green but the inside of their wings and a few patches on their squashed looking faces were a bright red. I took a few steps back, away from the woods.

"W..what are they?" I gasped.

"I think they're called Velcher Tusks, but I call em dumb fucks. They tend to stay away from us, they're stupid as shit, but if ya get in their way they can be nasty mother fuckers. So remember don't come out at night alone or without something ya think can take one of them out with." I looked at him and found his eyes all ready on me. I couldn't help it and I blushed, I hoped against hope that it was too dark for him to see. "Okay? We done?"

"They won't attack the barracks will they?"

"Not after I'm done with the bastards." He plucked the spent cigarette from his lips and stomped it out.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm gonna kill 'em..." He explained to me with a sarcasm I didn't appreciate.

"Alone? But you can't! They'll eat you alive!"

I got a full, heart felt scowl from him and I felt like running back to my room. He didn't give me a real response but started off toward the beasts.

"You just get your ass inside."

I hung back where he left me for a moment, he strode confidently toward the monster filled trees. My head was full of crushing worry and panic, my heart was beating painfully fast. I was being an idiot, I'm sure he thought I was, but I couldn't stand by and let him do this. I had only just met him, but I didn't want to be here with out him. My broken in work boots thudded soundlessly over the soft grass as I ran to stop him. I grabbed a hold of his left arm and planted my feet to stop him. He tried to shrug me off angrily but I held on.

"Get the hell off me!" His cobalt eyes snapped onto my pleading hazel eyes safe behind my glasses.

"Please don't do this..." I begged him. He looked annoyed and perplexed. Over his set scowl his right brow cocked up a bit. "You're out numbered and they're massive... please don't go alone..."

"Ya think I'm gonna get eatin' by those shit for brains?" I gave him no answer but he found it in my eyes. "You've been in that city too long..." He started suddenly and he glared out into the woods.

Hesitantly I did the same. Four pairs of red eyes were fixed on us, and were slowly prowling out to meet us.

"You might be an engineering whiz, but god damn you're stupid." He growled and ripped his arm away from my feeble grip. He held his spear at the ready and burst out into a dash. He had an odd sort of run, like his legs wanted to move faster than the rest of him and propelled themselves ahead of everything else. "When I finish these assholes you better not still be standing there!" He shouted.

I stumbled over my own feet but made my way quickly back. Within in a few feet from the entrance of the barracks, I turned. Three Velcher Tusks had lumbered out to meet him and he was fighting all of them. I watched in stunned awe as he swung his spear around and despatched them one by one. With one last strong jab the last beast was destroyed, it's body dematerializing and blowing away on the night breeze. I felt my hands pressed against my mouth, and I kept them there, I wasn't quite sure if I'd shout out or not if they weren't there. He suddenly whipped around to face me, he looked past me. The pit fell out of my stomach when I felt the beast's hot breath ruffle my hair. He ran at me full throttle curse after curse spewing out of him, I couldn't really hear what he was saying. The soft breathing behind me was the only thing my ears could register. My knees were shaking horribly and I wanted to close my eyes but I was scared stiff. Cid was only a few feet from me when the creature let out a bone rattling roar.

"Get on the god damn ground!" Cid screamed at me, and over my fear I heard him.

My knees gave out and I saw him kick off the grass. He shot into the air like a bullet out of a gun. Higher than I thought possible for a person to jump. He sailed over me and brought his spear down on the monster with a scream of rage. And just like that it was over. I could barely breathe, he straightened himself up and turned to me openly livid.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Can't you take fucking orders? You wanna get yourself killed? You might be dumber than they fucking are!" He seized my arm and wrenched me to my feet. I knew my eyes were wide and felt the tears building up. "Is your skull full of fuckin horse shit?" I felt the tears slide down my face and he stopped mid swear. I broke down into sobs the fear streaming out of me in hot tears and my shame in the form of my strangled breathing. Through my tears I saw him roll his eyes and let out a gentle sigh. "You all right?"

I could barely nod through the convulsions that kind of crying brought. His harsh grip failed and I covered my face with my hands as I hiccuped for breath. He patted my shoulder cautiously.

"Come on now, don't carry on like this. The big idiot didn't even notice ya. He was waitin' for me." When my ridiculous break down didn't let up he got annoyed again. "Well, it serves ya right for doubtin' me! Ya gotta a lot to learn and I don't plan on having to find another replacement! So get a hold of yerself all ready!"

"I...I'm sorry." I choked.

"Well... it's okay. But let's get you inside before you attract more of em."

I was so grateful that no one came into the hall as we passed. I didn't want anyone to see me like this, it was bad enough he had. I managed to compose my self to just sniffling by the time we got to my door. I wiped my eyes in embarrassment, he looked at me like I was the most confusing creature he had ever seen. I wanted to lock myself in my room and never come out, but before I closed the door he spoke again.

"Good night Shera."

I hesitated and he gave me a nod and walked away. I smiled softly to myself and finally got to go to sleep.

---------------------Final Fantasy VII and all related characters are © Square-enix------------


	2. Chapter 2

(This chapter contains dialog taken directly from the game, you have been warned.)

Chapter Two

The months seemed to fly by, and moment by moment I realized how right Donnie was . I loved it here, and I loved the Captain. I didn't have any more run ins with the hostile wild life after my first night, and we were moving along with completing the rocket before schedule. It took a bit of coaxing but I finally got the Captain to show me the pet project he was working on. It was, in a word, spectacular. The garage harbored what had made him a legend, the plane he had flown that gave him the prestige of being dubbed the greatest pilot in the world, it was bright red and named the Tiny Bronco. But the amazing feat he had been slaving over while we were working with the rocket was an airship. I actually got weak in the knees when I first saw it, and to my secret delight he held me up. He had gotten rather generous in how often he showed me his crooked smile. Even though he still berated me with insults and teasing, I couldn't help but think that there was something new in his eyes when he looked at me. I think I might have just hoped that there was something there, but with out hope where would we be? We spent a good amount of time together, it turned out that we both enjoyed tea, and he'd join me for a cup at least once a day. It was rather funny, he would only let me ask him one question a day, and would warn me about the strict limit each time he saw me. However, that rule didn't apply to things of a mechanical nature. So he answered my novel sized list of questions about his airship with a proud smile. It was named after him, the Highwind was something that the world would remember him for until the end of time. With this marvelous creation he would be famous. He was so proud of it that it made me love the craft all the more.

That's why it hurt so much when they took it. The rocket was progressing quickly and we estimated that launch was around three months away. Spirits were so high at the base and we knew that Shinra would send someone out to see the progress soon. When we knew Shinra was coming we tended to get nervous, especially Cid. He didn't know how to act around them, he knew he shouldn't curse in front of them, that he had to be polite, be respectful, be prim and proper, all things that were alien to him. During these times he could often be found pacing mindlessly, smoking like a chimney, and would rarely show up for meals. When he got that way, we all got worried. It was after a few days of the Captain going through this cycle that they came to the base.

I was in the garage rooting through the files looking for the blueprints for the rocket's oxygen tanks, there was just something that was bothering me. I couldn't put my finger on it. I wished I had been around when they were constructed but they were already assembled and something didn't feel right. I was alone in there for a while, the Highwind and Tiny Bronco keeping me company. I fumbled through the cabinet it was supposed to be in, and found nothing. In aggravation I attempted to find it in another filing cabinet. While I was pouring through the files I was startled when someone spoke to me.

"Where is your Captain?"

I pushed up my glasses and looked up at the young Asian man with his hair pulled back into a ponytail, he was wearing an expensive black suit and was flanked by armored infantry soldiers. I knew who he was, he was Tseng. He was the leader of the Turks, Shinra's elite strong arm force, but why was he here?

"I.. Uh... he's..." I tried to think. The truth was I didn't know, and the fact that there were armed guards in front of me didn't help either.

"I wasn't expecting ya so soon!" Came Cid's voice to my rescue. He was approaching us from the garage's entrance. "What do ya think of the Shuttle? Coming along nicely ain't she?" Cid eyed the rifles. "Is there something going on here that I should know about?"

"Yes, there is as a matter of fact. We've come to bring the airship to Junon."

Whatever civil mood Cid had hoped to use quickly vanished.

"What?" He said with a furious flash in his eyes.

"It is operational is it not?" Tseng asked him obviously knowing the answer.

"You bet your ass she is! But when were you going ta tell me you were gonna take her?"

"I just did. It is the President's wish that the Highwind be moved so that we can begin to use it."

"I only just finished the god damned thing! Ya gotta gimme a chance to fly her first! To be sure nothing's wrong with her!" I saw him fighting to keep himself from attacking Tseng, he was clenching his fists.

"We're quite confident in your skills, and we will be taking it shortly." The Turk was cool headed and would not take no for an answer.

The look the Captain was giving him was enough to make other men look away. If looks could kill the Turks would be searching for a new leader.

"Shera, leave us alone." He didn't look at me, he was still glaring at the Turk. I quickly removed myself.

I sought out as many people as I could and told them that the Turks were here to take the Highwind. We all gathered in the rec room and voiced our outrage to each other. There was really nothing we could do to help the Captain, if anyone could convince them to keep it here it was him. We worked out scenarios of what was going on in the garage at this moment. Keith did a very good impression of the Captain and began cursing and swinging around a pool queue threatening an invisible Tseng. He had us all in stitches, until we heard it. We had heard the engine of the airship scream into life so many times while the Captain would test it. But this time it didn't turn off with a fit of profanity following it. We all rushed out of the rec hall and watched the newly perfected vessel rising steadily into the sky. I couldn't believe it. How could he have let them take it? My eyes left the sky and I found him sadly watching it vanish from sight over the Nibel mountains. He looked at the mass of us, each of our faces lined with pity and sorrow. He frowned.

"This isn't break time, get back to fucking work!" He shouted and disappeared into the garage.

Morale was at an all time low for the days that followed. Everyone was so upset and we were all worried sick about the Captain. I had been alone in drinking my tea and only saw the Captain for a few minutes a day. He made himself scarce and it was impossible to find him if he wanted to be alone. Regina had an idea that he would go out and kill monsters to blow off steam, and she might have been right, he always had his spear with him lately. I wondered if he carried it in case the Turk came back. He didn't really talk to anyone, when they did happen upon him that is. I hadn't seen him at all today and I laid in my bed staring at the ceiling. I wanted to know that he would be okay, that he'd get over the heartache. After all, the launch was steadily approaching, and he was our astronaut. I didn't like think about that, I was so anxious about making sure he'd be safe up there. I don't know what I'd do if something happened to him. I tossed and turned, sleep was not on the roster for tonight. I got out of my bed and tried to busy myself with figuring out what was bothering me with the oxygen tanks, but I couldn't focus. I grabbed a hammer and left my room.

The grass was wet beneath my bare feet as I started toward the mess hall. I wasn't really hungry but I didn't know what else to do with myself. It was a dangerously dark night, and I wished the "weapon" I had brought was a flashlight instead. I was about halfway between the two locations when I noticed a small red glow in the distance. I wondered what time it was, because if it was before midnight then I might have to take back what I said earlier. The embers of the cigarette burned again and I carefully approached him.

"Captain?" I asked, I could faintly make him out in the dark.

"Evenin'." He grunted.

He was sitting on the ground with his back against the outside of the formal meeting hall. I was happy to see him, glad to know he was all right, and I was selfishly glad he was alone. I crouched beside him and he didn't look at me, he kept his eyes in front of him unblinking. I opened my mouth to speak to him when he cut me off.

"Just one remember." He warned me.

"But I haven't had a chance to see you in a while, I figure you owe me at least five." I negotiated.

"Don't ask me about it, cuz I don't wanna fuckin' think about it." He growled impatiently.

"Fair enough." I said as I sat beside him, the cold grass dampening my pajama pants. "Are you almost done?" I asked, surprised at my own forwardness.

"With what? My cigarette?" He asked me, his blue eyes looking into mine for the first time in what felt like forever.

"No, with hiding from everyone." He rolled his eyes and his lips curled in a deep frown as he looked away from me. I continued. "I know it's hard, but we need you. The launch date is so close and we need you around to help us."

"Yer doin' fine. An' it's not like I'm not around." He grumbled.

"You're our anchor Captain, we're all so worried about you..."

"Well who asked ya to be? I'm a grown man I don't need people to fucking worry about me!" He took a long drag and held it in for a while.

"Well we do."

"It's my job to worry about you guys, not the other way around." He blasted the air with the foul smelling smoke.

"It's not our job, and it's your own damn fault we care about you!"

His eyes danced onto me and a playful grin spread across his face.

"Listen to you... I must be contagious."

I chewed on my bottom lip, I have a tendency to do that when I'm nervous or trying to keep something in. I had four questions left, but I didn't want to waste them on stupid things like his feelings for me. Because really, who was I trying to kid?

"You're not going to leave us are you?"

"An' let them send some one else to fulfill my dream? Shit no." He took another cigarette from the pack and lit it from the dying butt in his hand. "You keepin' count?"

"I've still got three sir."

"Ya know you can bank those an' save em' for a rainy day." He said plainly, he probably wanted to be left alone. I knew he wanted to be alone, he wasn't ready to carry on like nothing had happened.

"I've still got a few more if that's all right?"

"No one told me you were sofuckin' chatty when they recommended you." He mumbled.

"Probably because they wanted to get rid of me." I smiled. He laughed and sprayed the dark night with a dust colored cloud.

"Okay, go ahead smarty pants. Use up your questions, but to save you some time.. I'm a Pisces, and boxers."

I blushed deeply, and childishly. He saw it. For the first time I knew he saw me blush.

"Too much info for ya Ms. Engineer?" He sneered.

I bit my lip again and wanted to crawl into a hole somewhere. Could he see how I felt about him? Was he flirting with me or was he just being the same old Cid? I wanted to put my arms around him, wanted to tell him that everything would work out and that I would always be here for him. Instead I brushed my bangs out of my eyes.

"I don't think that the rocket will get done on time unless you help us."

He gave me a thoughtful look, he wasn't an idiot after all and I was never good at smoothly changing the subject. He slowly blinked.

"That wasn't a question."

"I know. I have been doing some calculations and the probability is very low."

"You have, have you?" He eyed me, I nodded. "Well then, I guess I gotta stop feelin' so damn sorry for myself and start beatin' the shit outta you guys to get your work done."

"I'm glad to hear you say that Captain." I shifted in a bit closer to him, and there was a tension there. I guess I really did give too much away with that transition. I whispered to him. "Captain, if I may be so bold, I think that there is a flaw in the rocket's construction."

"Oh?" He raised his eyebrows at me. "And what would that be?"

"Well... I'm not sure." He laughed again, and I let my temper rise a bit. "I think you should take me seriously Captain since you're the one who will be hurt if I'm right!"

"Whoa.. Okay okay I'm listening." He responded in mock fear.

"Something's off with the oxygen tanks..."

"They're fine. I checked them myself."

"I do not see how you can say that."

"I said I checked them dammit. You gonna tell me I'm wrong?" His voice iced over ever so slightly.

"No, if you didn't check them more than five times a piece you wouldn't notice..."

"Is that what you're wasting your time doing? Shit Shera! There isn't even a whole god damned rocket yet! Worry about that shit later!" He fumed.

"How long have you wanted to go into space Captain?" The question defused the anger, I hoped it would.

"My whole life... two left." He took the cigarette out of his mouth and motioned it toward the hammer I held. "What the hell you got that thing for?"

"Oh..." I twisted my hands around it, "Well, I was told once not to walk around at night without a weapon..."

"So you grab a hammer?" He shook his head slowly with a chuckle.

"What would you rather have me carry around?" I asked defensively.

"Oh I dunno, something that would help you if need be. Oh and I'm counting that one." He smiled.

"No, that's not fair that was in response to one of your own questions!" I frowned at him.

"A question's a question. Got one left, then I'm off the hook." He said with finality.

I sighed to myself and set my mind to work. I was happy being here, as silly as it is, even though he was teasing me, I just loved being able to spend time with him. To be able to talk with him without anyone else interfering. I was here so close to him, and the breeze was drifting his cologne to me. I received it in greedy nosefuls. He just sat beside me patiently awaiting my last question, unaware of just how much he effected me. I loved him, totally and completely. God knows how it would all play out, would I ever be able to confess this to him? Would he laugh at me and tell me to get back to work? Would he take me in his arms and kiss me? Sitting here in the soggy grass my head and heart full of unspoken feelings I grasped onto reality by a thread. I had one last question...

"Captain... why did you really pick me for this team?"

He exhaled the last of his smoke and extinguished the butt.

"You weren't like the others." He cracked his knuckles. "That all?"

"No you have to elaborate on that... that was barely an answer!" I said gripping a fistful of his sleeve.

"You're smart, but not sneaky, you're stubborn, but less stubborn than me, you're a reliable worker, you don't make mistakes, and you have the patience of a saint. That enough?" He asked, his eyes on me that un-identifiable glint in them.

"Yes... thank you Captain." I responded softly and released him.

He stood, brushed off his pants, and took up his spear. He started to walk toward the rocket.

"Will I see you for tea tomorrow?" I shouted after him.

"I don't have to answer anythin' else!" He waved a hand up in the air, without looking back. I laughed to myself and suddenly felt tired. It would be okay, he would be back to normal by morning... I knew it. I patted the hammer on my hand lightly and headed back to the barracks.

I was right. The production picked up at full speed with Cid overseeing and aiding in the construction. Our new found enthusiasm was tiring and fulfilling. I had a tea partner again, and he seemed happy. He was under a lot of pressure but he didn't show any sign of weariness. He taunted us, made us laugh, and went off to read up on what awaited him in the great vastness of space. Before too long the outer casing of the Shinra no. 26 was intact and her insides were all in order. As far as everyone else was concerned anyway, I still snuck in from time to time to do my now routine analysis of those blasted oxygen tanks. It was so frustrating... I couldn't understand what was wrong... I was told quite firmly by the Captain to forget it, but I couldn't. Now it was two days before launch. The rocket was ready, the Captain was practically giddy, the Shinra executes would arrive tomorrow night to oversee the final preparations and the lift off, so we had our party this evening.

The stories were flung around loudly and animatedly. Liquor kept getting passed to the Captain and he dared not refuse a single drop. Pool was played and we let the Captain win each game. He was happier tonight than I had ever seen him before. He was hugged and swarmed by our friends and co-workers in various states of drunkeness all night. We were making so much noise I was surprised we weren't surrounded by Velcher Tusks. It was before people started passing out that Cid called everyone's attention to himself. He held his spear in one hand and waved everyone into quiet.

"Now lissen up! I don't wantcha all fuckin' willly nilly as soon as I blow this joint! You kids behave cuz when I come back I don't wanna see you jack asses slackin!" His cheeks were red and his speech slurred but we cheered anyway. "Now I got some shit I gotta do before I forget... Donald Louis! Get your scrawny ass up here!" Donnie found his way up to him where the Captain slapped him hard on the shoulder and held the spear out to him. "You're the man of tha' house now! You keep em in line until I get back! And you keep the Dumb fucks away! An' be sure to look out for those stupid ass idiots who go out with fuckin' hammers as weapons..." He winked at me, and everyone laughed. My face burned red.

"Sure thing Captain! But hey I gotta ask ya somethin'." Donnie took the spear. "How'd you learn to jump so high?"

"I sat on a campfire as a kid."

Laughter drowned out the rest of the evening. People fell asleep where they sat, the more responsible found their way back to their rooms, and a few of us stayed. I was forced to drink things that were bad enough to melt paint off of cars, but I didn't want to miss a second. It was well past three thirty in the morning when he asked me to keep him company as he smoked his last cigarette. The night was warm and the sky clear. The stars glittered happily over head, the moon sleepily hung over our rocket.

"So ya got a chance to ask me one more question before the big wigs come in." He said as he lit the cigarette.

My mind was hazy with alcohol and my heart was pulling me toward him. I was so frightened, I didn't know what was wrong with the 7th and 8th oxygen tanks, and he was going to be at their mercy. I didn't want to be here without him, but I knew he wouldn't give this up for anything. It was so hard to stand there, watching him, knowing that he'd be worlds away in a day's time.

"Can it possibly be? After all this time ya ran out of questions?" He laughed, his eyes smiling at me.

Before I could reason with it, or think, I found my body wrapping my arms around him. My face pressed in his shirt, and my hands on his strong shoulder blades. I let out a quivering breath, holding in my tears, the liquor making this all seem okay. He looked down at me and patted my head gently.

"Hey, take it easy there. I'll be back..." He gave me a soft smile.

"But what if you can't... what if I screwed it up?" I asked taking in his warmth.

"That's a simple question, you didn't screw up, someone would have noticed if you had. I'm not dyin' anytime soon, I promise."

My glasses were smudged with tears but I could see how gorgeous he looked as he was framed by the stars. His face was close and I worked up my courage. After all these months I closed my eyes and went to kiss him. My heart was in song, I was in love with him and I would tell him. My lips were greeted by a scruffy cheek. My eyes fluttered open, he had turned his head, my heart fell into my toes. He cleared his throat and slid out of my loose grip.

"Well I gotta get some sleep... I'm going to have such a hangover tomorrow."

He left me standing there. My heart broke with each step he took. Defeated and sobbing I retreated to my room where I cried myself to sleep.

I remained in my room for the majority of the next day. I was ashamed, embarrassed, heart broken, and above all this sick as a dog. My head was pounding, my eyes were aching, my stomach terribly queasy, I wanted to die. I didn't dare eat anything, and only a few people came to check on me. When Randal came to make sure I was still alive he told me that I wasn't alone in my pain. He said everyone on the base had hangovers, all of various intensity but he said I had it the worst. I wanted to know if he knew what I had done, but I didn't want to tip him off if he didn't. Somehow, I knew Cid would not tell anyone, but I couldn't shake my worry. I was left to myself soon enough, and to get my mind off of my misery I stared at the blue prints again. It was maddening, I knew it. It was wrong, terribly wrong, and if I didn't fix it... he might die. The launch was going to be early tomorrow morning... less than twenty four hours. I knew that the Shinra executives would be arriving soon, maybe in twenty or so minutes. I'm not sure why, maybe it was my exhaustion, or the closeness of zero hour but I saw it. Tank number 7's problem, and it was serious.

Somehow the piping had been misaligned, not by much but enough to result in disaster. If it remained the way it was, when the Captain would least expect it, when power was applied to the tank the damaged Teflon-insulated electrical wires powering the stirrer motor would catch fire which would in turn cause the internal pressure to build up and would result in an explosion. One that would not only destroy the no. 7 but also do unpredictable damage to the surrounding tanks. I didn't have anytime to sit around and pat myself on the back, if the launch was still going to happen I'd have to get to work on that immediately.

I encountered no one on my way to the Shinra 26, they were all in the meeting hall with the Captain. No doubt rehearsing proper etiquette. I set to work, with a clear mind. I had done it. I had found what was bothering me, now I just had a few hours to get it right, or the Captain's dreams would be shattered. As I opened the massive tool box I had lugged from the empty garage, tied up my hair, rolled up my sleeves, I promised myself that I would not leave until this was done. In the bowels of the shuttle no daylight could reach me, nothing but artificial light met my eyes and I had no perception of time. I worked harder than I ever had, I was doing a job that normally would keep three crew members busy for quite sometime. I had finished up no. 7 and I decided to try the technique on no. 8, who I had not found a steady unshakable problem with. My eyes were bleary and my body going into auto pilot.

I knew more time had passed than it felt like, but when I heard people taking enthusiastically above me, I panicked. It was time for the launch and I still hadn't finished my final scans of the efficiency of my repairs. I calmed myself. I could do this. I had to do this for him. He didn't reciprocate my affection but I couldn't help how I felt, and I wanted to bring him happiness. If I could get the rocket into space, even if it meant my life, I would do it for him. Knowing that I would help him achieve his dream strengthened my resolved and stopped the shaking of my hands as I fixed the inconsistencies in tank 7. No. 8 was still reading slightly off, but I had to try and figure out what was ailing it in such little time. An automatic announcement declared that there was three minutes until launch. A blaring siren started and the emergency lights flashed their blinding red bulbs. The crackle of the intercom erupted in my compartment.

"Hey goddammit! Who the fuck's still in there?" Cid screamed through the static.

" It's Shera, Captain. Don't mind me, go ahead with the launch. " I responded flatly. I had made my choice.

"Shera? What are you still doin' in there? " His voice was burdened with enough panic for both of us.

"I was still concerned. The results of the oxygen tank test weren't satisfactory." The scans were looking normal for no. 7.

"You stupid little bitch! It's gonna get so hot in there that there ain't gonna be SHIT left when we blast off! You're gonna be burnt to a crisp! You're gonna die! You know that, doncha?" His voice cracked in a mix of anger and terror.

" I don't mind. If I can just fix this, the launch will be a success. I'm almost done." The test was looking very good, this would work...

"Almost done? You're gonna die! " His electronically projected voice rang through the corridor. I was flattered by how concerned he was for me but, I couldn't get distracted. Not now.

There was a transmission from ground control that I could hear through his intercom.

"Cid, we must start the countdown. We won't make it if we don't! Starting engine!"

"Hey, wait a minute! Shera's still in here! " He shouted in outrage.

"What are you going to do, Cid? If we cancel now, it'll be another six months until the next launch! " Ground control sounded as if the answer was obvious.

"GODDAMMIT, Shera... you wanna make me a murderer? " He screamed at me.

"Captain!" I cried out. A smile he couldn't see on my face.

"Shera?" He retorted with hope, no doubt he was wishing I'd tell him I was scurrying out of the rocket.

" Tank Number 7 check is complete. Once I complete Tank Number 8, it's all clear." I had done it. It was flawless, 7 was saved.

"Come on, Shera... hurry up... You're gonna die.." He nervously pleaded with me.

"30 seconds until ignition. Beginning countdown. Cid! Forget about her. We won't make it in time." Ground control tried to reason with him.

"What... what am I ...What am I supposed to do...?" He sounded so torn, so terribly torn.

"15 seconds until ignition. Internal temperature rising."

I wiped the sweat from my brow, and pressed on. I would NOT fail him. Over the building tension of impending lift off I heard him quietly speaking to himself.

"Oh man, the moon... outer space... my dreams..."

My heart sunk into my stomach. No, no Cid don't. Please have faith in me... don't let this get away from you.

"Ignite engine." Announced ground control.

The tremor nearly knocked me down, but I clung to the oxygen tank feebly trying to read the results as they appeared on my scanner. I couldn't last like this, not too long. I only had a few minutes.. If not seconds. The engines were screaming, the flames would surely produce a heat to incinerate me, I had to make these last few moments matter. I heard it, heard his voice like a distant dream.

"SH--------------IT!"

The rocket lurched. I was thrown across the corridor where my head collided with tank 3 and I lost consciousness.

It was with intense pain and disorientation that I awoke. The room around me was dark and I couldn't ignore the screaming agony of my head and my left leg. I blinked slowly and saw I was in the medical ward in the rec hall. What had happened? How was I here? My heart felt like it was plunged into an ice bucket. He wouldn't abort... no. He couldn't have. I brought a weak hand to my head and felt a heavy bandage under my fingers. It was damp with what I knew was blood. My leg was severely bandaged as well. I felt like I had been pelted with rocks from every possible angle. My glasses were on the side table, the frames bent but the lenses still intact. I tried to sit up but couldn't. I was completely alone. Not a sound came from the rec room down the hall, I didn't hear any noise from the Doc's office. What had I done?

My sorrow deepened as the hours passed. I had no one to ask the questions that were eating me up inside. What he alive? Did he make it to space? What the hell had happened! I couldn't help but cry. Why was no one here? I needed to know... someone please... tell me. It was after what seemed like a hundred years Doctor Hoffman came to check on me.

"Oh you're awake." Was all he said. It wasn't happy, it wasn't anything.

"Doctor! What happened! Where's the Captain! Is he all right?" I was about to explode with anxiety.

"..." His fuzzy face was void of emotion. He checked my pulse and spoke to the bed sheets. "The Captain has a couple bad bruises and a few minor cuts but he'll survive."

"No..." I felt the thick tears roll onto my soaked pillow. "He didn't..."

"What did you think he'd do!" He asked me angrily. "He performed an emergency shut down to save you! Why were you even in there?"

"I..." I choked, but he didn't care to hear my answer.

"The rocket nearly crushed the base! It's leaning ominously over us as we speak! How could you do this to him? To us? The Space Program is currently suspended until the President decides upon the final fate of it. You understand? We might get shut down because of you!"

I thought that my heart had broken when Cid turned his lips away from me, but I realized now that was impossible. Because I felt it... it shattered and the fragments pierced my insides. I had done what I told myself I wouldn't... I failed him. Utterly and completely. I had destroyed his dream, what he had strived for his whole life... I had crushed it. I wished that this was a nightmare... someone would wake me up. Was this hell? Oh my god. What had I done? I couldn't do anything but weep.

I didn't receive any visitors. The only person I saw was the Doctor and he hadn't spoken to me since our conversation. After a few days he released me from his care and I was forced to face the people who had good right to hate me. It was apparent as soon as I entered the rec room the damage that had been caused by the failed launch. The broken windows were covered in plastic and large holes in the walls had been patched. I couldn't take it in. I had devastated everything I tried to protect. I exited the building in the light of the setting sun. the Doc was right. It hung over my head, the rocket was leaning eerily as if it would come crashing down upon us at any minute. I did that. I was responsible. The other buildings were also in disarray. Trees were up rooted and had been thrown into or collapsed upon the meeting hall. It was completely destroyed. The barracks were still intact, and the garage had been partially demolished, I could still see the Tiny Bronco, there was some surface damage but it wasn't totaled.

My left leg was sporting a new nasty burn that would turn into a horrible scar in only a matter of time. But that seemed so little punishment for what I had brought upon these people that were like my family. I trudged to the barracks, emptiness devouring me. I didn't deserve to be alive, I wished I was dead. If there was any justice... I would be. I kept my head down as I moved through the hall. I didn't want to see how the crew members were looking at me. I got to my door and found it already open. They had trashed it. Everything I owned was strewn around or broken. They had written on my walls, broken my mirrors, shredded my clothes, I simply stared. I deserved this, I couldn't get upset. I think I had met my limit of misery. A hand gently patted my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't here to stop them." Said Donnie's voice by my ear. I shook my head the tears falling silently,

"No. It's okay. I understand."

"I know whatever you were doing... you didn't mean for this to happen." He said sadly. I knew he was just as mad as everyone else, maybe he had worked through it. He knew I wasn't malicious, just stupid.

"I deserve this." I said firmly and walked into my ruined room. I didn't want to look at him. I wanted to disappear.

"I'll help you straighten up." I heard his boots crunch on the broken glass of my mirror.

"That's okay." I heard my voice quaver.

"I wasn't asking. I'm going to."

I lost it. Sitting in the middle of my dilapidated room I burst into a wave of tears. I was sure I had used them all but there seemed to be no shortage in sight. For the first time since I had awoken, I was hugged. Donnie wrapped his arms around me and let me cry on his shoulder silently. It was days before I could bare to speak to anyone, I apologized to them all. It was still painful for them, but for the most part they understood I hadn't done it on purpose. I knew they all resented me, but I expected it. I was still alive, even though I prayed to die to end my agony. It was only a matter of time until there was only one last person I had to apologize to. I hadn't seen Cid for even a second. He was avoiding me, I couldn't blame him. I had to find him, I knew he hated me, but I had to tell him I never meant for this to happen.

----------Final Fantasy VII, direct quotes, and all related characters are © Square-enix----------------


	3. Chapter 3

1Thanks for the reviews everyone! More direct quotes ahoy!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Three

As it so often happened, I spotted him after dark by the dim embers of his cigarette. Instead of my usual butterflies upon such a sight, I was consumed by dread. Still, I had to do something. He didn't move an inch when I approached him. He was sitting on one of the downed trees, his eyes locked on the leaning rocket.

"Captain... I am so sorry. I never ever dreamed this would happen..." I said the words catching in my throat. "I never thought you'd... the tanks... they..."

He didn't respond. His cold expression stayed on the 26. I was all ready falling apart. He must know that I had feelings for him, that I didn't mean to hurt him. I tried in vain to find any words to express my regret, my stupid mistake, my sin against him... but I couldn't. My throat closed around my words and I could do nothing but watch him. He didn't remove his scowl or his eyes from their target. He refused to even acknowledge I was there. This silence.. This cold shoulder, it was worse than anything I had ever been subjected to. I couldn't take it.

"Please... Scream at me... curse at me tell me that you hate me, tell me I'm an idiot! I know that I am! Hit me if you want... just say something..." I sobbed in devastation.

"Now, I'm the one with the question." His voice was almost unrecognizable. He still didn't look at me, and the tone of disgust that was in his voice made me glad he wasn't. He exhaled angrily, but he didn't shout, probably because I had asked him to. Instead he spoke in a growling whisper. "You really thought I'd kill you?"

"I..." I lowered my head and the tears rained on the scorched grass. "I... didn't think you'd... I just wanted to... I had to... I'm so sorry."

A cigarette landed at my feet, the dying embers hopelessly fighting for life. It felt like my heart was being squeezed in a vise, I was in more pain now then I ever was in the Doctor's care. I heard the heavy feet approach and watched through soggy eyes as his worn boot crushed the spent smoking cylinder. He twisted his treads extinguishing the last of it's light.

"I know I can never undo what I've done," my voice was strong but shaky with remorse, "I will do anything to help you. I'll live my life for you... I don't ask for your forgiveness... but please... don't ignore me..."

"Why would I want your useless life? You think I want to start a god damned collection? You want me to put your fuckin' waste of existence up there on the mantelpiece next to mine?" His voice was right in front of me, all I had to do to see his face, his blue eyes, was to look up. I couldn't bring myself to do it.

"Please... it's all I have to give you..."

"Then keep it. I don't want anything to do with you." He stood over me for a minute before he left. I didn't have to look at him, I could feel the anger in his eyes, the pain.

I returned to my room, if you could even refer to it as such. Donnie had helped me straighten it up, but most of the damage was irreversible. I had patched the mattress, shoddily, but it served it's purpose. Some of the other girls had given me some of their clothes out of pity, and though I didn't ask them I was glad they cared. This room was less my own now then it was the day I first arrived. It was a cell, a shrine to what I had done. It seemed my tears had run themselves dry as I sat on the battered bare mattress. He was right, I was useless. I had been given the chance of a life time, an opportunity to go down in the history books, but instead won myself the eternal shame of destroying the dreams of the man I loved. A letter from my mother sat on the remains of my desk, I didn't even have to open it to know that they had heard. She would no doubt be begging me to come home. As I laid my head down on the ruined bed, I knew that would be worse than anything anyone here could dish out. To come home, the hot shot engineer, a failure and horrible person. I deserved that too. He didn't need to be reminded of what I had taken from him on a daily basis by my unwanted presence. I made my decision, I would leave for Kalm as soon as I could. If I left him, everyone, they might be able to move on, might be able to salvage the rocket, the program. I would go home. To atone for my stupidity, the only punishment I could see as fitting would be to become the daughter my mother wanted. Disconnect myself from everything I loved, anything that he loved, become a housewife with no ambition. My burn hurt badly, but despite the physical and mental anguish I did fall asleep.

It was around noon when people finally caught onto what I was doing. I didn't have much to pack, but I did return the clothes the girls had given me. I apologized once more to anyone who would listen, and Donnie was rather upset to see me go. I received different reactions from all of them, some were relieved with my decision, while some asked me insistently to stay, but my mind was set. I couldn't carry on there, even though I felt like I was leaving my soul behind. I wasn't the only member leaving, it seemed that Shinra was quick to offer people new positions within the company. Maybe they couldn't bare the disappointment or they were just ready to leave, I'm not sure. I didn't meet any resistance from anyone as I got onto the transport and I quickly hid myself in the back. I had a lonely ride back to my hometown.

I was greeted happily and eagerly by my mother and father, even Evan, my second eldest brother, was there to meet me. They tried to lift my spirits but soon saw that I was not the person I once was. I was like a zombie, following my mother around doing what she asked me to. She was as happy as a clam. This was what she always wanted for me anyway. I was bought a slew of dresses and matching shoes. The dresses had to be longer and not as "flirty" as my mother would have liked, to hide my scar. I was told how inconvient that was and how many handsome men would just look away, I didn't even pretend to care. I was subjected to the horror of beauty salons, curling and burning my hair, and painting my nails. She preened over me, so happy that I finally "came to my senses". Her joy nearly flat lined her when I completely agreed to bi-pass my father's garage. I was greeted each morning by a stranger in my mirror. A pretty girl with tweezed eyebrows, permed curls, and a sadness in her eyes. I knew I'd never be able to forget my pain, I'd never be able to forget him. Even when my mother introduced me to the young "available" men in the town, I longed for his crooked smile and blue eyes. No one knew me here. To them I was just a slender girl of marrying age, with a talkative mother and that was what I was to become.

It even went as far to throw away all of my books, magazines, anything that wasn't what she wanted. I didn't bat a newly curled and mascara-ed eyelash when she enthusiastically threw them out. Even though I was there, my heart was still firmly planted in the poor ruined base, under the shadow of our rocket. Mom paraded me around like a show pony and told me to flash a smile that wasn't so empty. I was clever but I couldn't do the impossible. Every night my feet ached and longed for the boots they loved more than any fancy high heeled shoes. The inside of my eyelids were burned with the faces of the people I had hurt. The emptiness smothered me from all angles. It was a while until I felt a true smile split my features.

On a particularly wet and nasty evening a knock came to our door. Of all the people it could have been I never expected to see Donnie standing there. I nearly knocked my father over to hug the soaking wet traveler. He had to take a close look at me to be certain who I was.

"Donnie what are you doing here?" I asked him, so glad to be talking to someone who knew who I was, really knew who I was. Not this dress up doll I had become.

"Well we were in the area and I remembered hearing you said you lived here." He smiled at me, I could see the grease and oil smudges on his plump cheeks under his dark hooded raincoat. The world outside the house was dark and wet, but seemed so much more welcoming than anything these four walls had to offer. The rain splattered him from all angles, and I was becoming rather soaked myself.

"Leave it to you to make us stand out in the god damned rain."

I nearly threw up on Donnie's slicker when I heard his voice. I hadn't even noticed there was another person standing just out of sight to his right. If the cold rain wasn't proving that I was really there I would have sworn it was all a bizarre dream. I felt my mother's heavily ringed hand grab my arm to pull me back inside as she hastily apologized and invited the men inside. I couldn't breathe, I watched him pull the wet hood away from his face as he tracked water into the house.

"My, my, I suppose you gentlemen were on the same crew as my daughter, were you? I apologize for that, she is quite an impetuous and troublesome young thing!" Chirped my mother pleasantly. Oh, she would be the talk of the town the next day, all the gossip would be about the strange men Lia Olsen let in her house. She lived for being the center of gossip. She elbowed me and I shut my gaping mouth. "Shera don't be an idiot! These men are cold and wet! Go put on a pot of tea!"

Cid's cold stare was fixed on me. Tea... why did she have to say tea? I wanted to burst into tears, I wasn't sure if I was supposed to be happy or mortified but I scurried into the kitchen with out so much as a peep. As I fumbled to try and remember the "complicated" process of making tea I could hear my mother talking to them.

"Here let me take your coats gentlemen. I am Lia, the fool's mother," Leave it to my mother to play to her audience. "I do feel absolutely wretched for what happened over there. I always knew she should have stayed here. Oh where is he...?"

"Mrs. Olsen, this is a lovely painting... is this an Amano original?" Donnie expertly diverted her attention.

I leaned heavily on the counter trying to gather my wits about me, this didn't make sense. Why was he here? I heard a chair scrape across the tiled floor behind me and felt a lump form in my throat. I glanced back and sure enough the Captain was seated at the table taking in the decor with aggravation. The kettle started to whistle. With a dull blink he reunited me with the eyes I missed more than the comfort of my boots.

"Don't tell me you're too stupid to remember to take the water off. Though I wouldn't doubt it." He regarded me as having as much importance as a flea, but just being a stupid girl in love the sound of his voice lifted my spirits.

I turned off the flame, quickly grabbed some tea bags, and an assortment of cups.

"I don't approve of this."

I froze in the process of fetching the milk and sugar. I returned my eyes sorrowfully to him, but I think my confusion was more apparent.

"C...Captain?" I asked nervously.

"You look like a damn fool." He regarded my dress with a cold stare, one I was sure I had given my mother when she first showed it to me. " Not that you aren't one. I mean, you'd have to be dense as one o' them Dumb Fucks to say that your life belonged to me and then leave for home the next day." There was no kindness in his tone, or gentleness in his eyes but I could have died happy at that moment.

"S...sir, you said you didn't want..."

"I've come to take back what is mine. Whether or not it's a completely useless sack of bones."

I bit my lip and had to hold back my tears of joy. He was being horrible to me, he was talking to me, he was taking me back with him.

"That tea is gettin' cold you jack ass! I won't drink it cold." He snarled.

It was an uncomfortable departure from my house. My mother was mortified to hear they were reclaiming me. She tried to make me seem as unappealing in every aspect she could possibly concoct. She broke down any walls of morals and was hell bent to keep her new "girly" daughter trapped here. I felt the weight of fear and dread smother me. I knew she didn't want me to go, but did she really think so poorly of me? Donnie shared my viewpoint and lost his temper before too long, Cid on the other hand drank his tea with a blank expression. I wanted to run up the stairs grab my clothes, the broken in pants and shirts spotted with grease and oil, throw them in a suitcase then get out of this house for good. I found that my mother was deliberately blocking the staircase, she was rather heavy and though I was on the scrawny side, I couldn't get past her. She flatly refused to listen to what Donnie was trying to explain to her. In her mind, this was just another fight she wanted to add to her list of victories. That would sound good when she got to talk to the nosey neighbors the next day.

I stood beside the staircase watching the two people argue with each other. If I tried to put in a word edge wise I was quickly silenced by someone. I hated it. There I was, in a pair of painful shoes that matched my violet dress, the curls in my hair falling into disarray due to the period of time I spent in the rain. I knew if I stayed here, I would loose myself completely. I would become this creature my mother was shaping, and I would forget myself. The me who loved carburetors, engines, and the smell of gasoline. That petrified me. I don't know why but when I saw the Captain set against the backdrop of my house, I was terrified of staying there. There were two worlds colliding, and I didn't belong in this one, the world of my mother's warped mind. I kicked off the ridiculous high heels and pulled my hair back into a messy pony tail. It was a simple action but it struck her like a bolt of lightning. I could barely see Cid watching me out of the corner of my eye, my full attention was on the glowering full face of my mother. She began reprimanding me immediately but I paid her no mind. I pushed past Donnie and tried to squeeze past her.

"And where do you think you're going?" She puffed up as big as she could.

"I have to get my things." I responded calmly,

"I forbid you to leave this house! You're my daughter and you'll do what I say!" She fumed.

I was twenty-five and I was not going to be treated like this... not after all she had just said about me. She must have seen my anger because she seemed to deflate ever so slightly.

"Move. I am not a little girl anymore, and I am not this!" I took a fist full of the skirt and swished it angrily. "I'm not your burden anymore..." I started, my face burning with rage.

"S'right. She's mine."

We all looked at the Captain while he set his drained cup on an empty portion of the table. He crammed his hands into his pockets and slid his unkind eyes onto the lot of us.

"Yours?" My mother repeated with a laugh of bitterness. She gave me a wicked glance. "So dear it seems like you've found some one to roll around in filth with."

The slap, I was sure, had ripped through the entire town as loud as an oncoming train. My hand stung but the red blotch on her face stung more, I'm positive. Her eyes were wide.

"I owe this man my life. And I intend to repay him by giving it to him for ruining his dreams." I pushed past her and set about gathering what I could.

It didn't take long and when I returned in my comfortable clothes, my clothes, with suitcase in hand my mother was nowhere to be seen. Donnie waited for me at the foot of the stairs and I quickly met him. I was still afraid of being stuck in that place, and I didn't want to give anything a chance to happen. It appeared as if Cid had left already and Donnie handed me a raincoat. The two of us came out into the downpour and I swear I felt the weight of the world lift off me. The town around us was hazed with the falling water, it was like being led out of a nightmare.

As we moved through the dark houses to leave this place completely, I asked him why they were in the neighborhood. I don't know if I imagined it or not but he seemed to pause for a minute, as if he was thinking up an answer. He told me that since I left, no one from Shinra had contacted them about what was to become of the program. He said that the company was offering jobs to people left and right, most took them. He went on to say that the barracks were in bad condition and they were forced to take them down. They used the wood and materials to build houses where the wrecked buildings once stood. It was unnerving. I couldn't imagine that, I wasn't sure what would be waiting for me when I returned there, I bit my lip absently. As it turned out he and the Captain had come to talk to Palmer in person, to try and get any information they could. It seemed as if Palmer had no more insight then they did. So then, that's what brought them here? But still, they came to get me, they didn't have to . They could have left me there to suffer a fate worse than death, I couldn't wrap my head around it.

He stopped outside of the Inn and went inside to get the pilot of the helicopter the company had provided as transport for them. I opted to stay outside. I wanted to smile, but I knew I shouldn't. I was so happy to be going back, but had to remind myself of what I had done that caused me to leave. I found myself staring at my house, the downstairs light was on and I could see silhouettes pass before the window. I had a feeling that I wouldn't be welcome there anymore, it hurt, but not as much as I thought it would. As my mind started to replay what memories I held of that place the door opened. I blinked and squinted to make sure I was seeing properly. Cid pulled the hood up over his head and moved away from the house as my father closed the door after him. He had stayed in there? I couldn't take my eyes off him. I felt like I hadn't seen him in years, I knew I had missed him dearly but I only felt the depth of my loss when he was here. I didn't know what I'd do if I lost him again. My broken heart slowly started scraping itself back together as he approached me. He could barely be seen under his hood and the rain, but I could see his eyes.

"I haven't forgiven you. An' I didn't come here to fuckin' save you from the walrus in there." He said coldly, obviously my mother had made a lasting impression on him.

"I never asked you to forgive me." I said hopelessly.

"An' don't expect things to be the way they were." He growled. "I'm not going to make this easy for you. I'm not going to hold back, if I want you to scrub the Tiny Bronco with a toothbrush I'll expect you to do it."

"I will, Captain. I am in your debt."

The Inn door opened and his face was illuminated by the smokey light. He was closer than I'd seen him since he'd come back into my life and he looked terrible. He looked like he hadn't slept since the launch and there were still a few scrapes on his face from the failed lift off. Donnie eyed each of us as we stared at each other, he finally cleared his throat.

"The pilot's on his way out... he said we should head back to the chopper."

So began phase two of my life. The base was no longer there, it was a small town, one that was finally dubbed Rocket Town. I was Cid's personal servant, and I slept on a cot in a small garage in the house he had built. The house wasn't large or very grand, it was built where the old hangar had been and the Tiny Bronco was parked in the high fenced in backyard. The crew members started dwindling as Shinra kept coming with more offers. They're victory finally came over Wutai and their attention turned away from space to the study of Mako and materia. More of our members left for new positions, but a few stayed. It was over the course of a couple years that the remaining few of our people had their families move into the town. The silence from Shinra was enough to dampen even Donnie's spirits, he had to do something else to occupy himself. He started the first real shop in town, he came into the business of selling accessories and weapons to the few travelers that came our way. Others soon followed in his lead. The tone of the people around us changed from co workers to neighbors. Although I was not allowed anywhere near the rocket, they still maintained it as best they could. It hadn't moved an inch since it had first leaned, and soon most barely noticed it. Times were changing, Shinra was even more powerful, and less and less interested in our work. One thing stayed the same however. Cid was true to his word and was extremely hard on me. He held back nothing and insulted me outright with out remorse.

I knew I had brought it upon myself but I couldn't help but get depressed. I knew I should hate him for how cruel he was to me, but call me crazy, I still loved him, I knew I had made him this way.. He drank a lot and would often come home with a looser tongue than he left with. I cried myself to sleep more than a few times when he was like that. Some nights he would not come back to the house. I suspected miserably, that he had found a warm bed with a warm body to bunk with. He always came back though, seemingly more vile and angry with me as the days passed. One night he was in the worst state that I have ever seen him in, even to this day. I heard him coming clumsily toward the house, and I knew he wouldn't be able to make it inside with out help. I expected to keep him up and stop him from falling face first onto the grass outside, I expected him to be wicked to me when I helped him get into the house, what I didn't expect was seeing him cry. He didn't break down sobbing or anything like that, but I did see the tears defiantly fall down his face. I didn't know what to do, I wanted to comfort him but I didn't know what ailed him.

"Captain... what's wrong? What happened?" I asked him in a hushed whisper as I sat him at the round table in the middle of the kitchen.

"Why the fuck did you make me do it?" He spoke to the air the few tears that escaped had made glistening trails through his stubble.

"What do you...?" I started quietly.

"Why did you make me choose between you and my dreams?" He shook his head and closed his eyes miserably. "S'not right... you're fucked up... but then again I am too." He clumsily stood and closed himself up in his room.

I stayed where he left me, mulling over what he had said. Was it possible? Had I destroyed more than I thought I did that day? Was he telling me... that he once cared for me deeper than his own desires? My thoughts were interrupted by his normal loud snoring. Somehow, the thought that he once had feelings for me didn't depress me as it should have, it restored a bit of me that I was in danger of losing. After that night he didn't drink heavily anymore. I didn't ask but I figured that he remembered what he had told me and didn't want it to happen again. I carried on as I always did, doing his menial and often exhausting tasks. Tea was always a staple on my to do list, it was the only time of day when he didn't scream or scowl at me. He wasn't talkative or pleasant, but it was nice to see him at ease, even if it was only for fifteen minutes.

The years had piled up to a grand total of four since the failed launch. It was a day just like any other when we heard the news over the television. President Shinra was dead. He had been murdered in his office in the Shinra building, officials believed it was the work one of two forces a small radical group that called themselves AVALANCHE, or the SOLDIER gone renegade Sephiroth. To replace the late President his son Rufus stepped up. I didn't know what to expect from this and neither did anyone else, would the young new President disband our dwindling funding? Or would he be interested in reopening the program?

It took a few months but we got word from the Shinra informing us that President Rufus would be coming to the town. Cid was beside himself, he wanted nothing more than the man to allow him to start to pick up the pieces of what he almost had. I could feel hope flow through every person that lived in the town. I even began to notice that the Captain was going easier on me, I wasn't sure if he was doing it consciously or if he was too distracted to pile work on me or relentlessly sling profanity at me. The days passed quickly, and we were closer to the impending visit of Rufus. The Captain had reverted to his old habits when we were expecting "company". He was missing meals, smoking up a storm, and pacing quite nervously. Donnie agreed with me, that was a good sign. The Captain spent more and more time in the rocket each day.

The day finally came, tension and excitement buzzed through the town like an electric current. I had brought Donnie lunch and returned the house. I heard voices coming from the back, by the Tiny Bronco. Had they come when I was away? Cid would kill me if I had missed them! I cautiously opened the back door. Three men were standing around the Bronco, admiring it. A large black man with what looked like a gatling gun instead a right hand, a tall elegant man dressed in black and red with an air of unnatural calmness, and a slender blonde man with a large sword and seriously spiked hair were talking quietly amongst themselves.

"Um... may I help you?" I asked them hesitantly.

I was fixed with three pairs of eyes. The blonde man's eyes glowed with an eerie brilliance, and I recalled what I had read about the Mako injections that Shinra gave the members of SOLDIER.

"No... We're just looking at it. " Confessed the blonde. He was young, but I couldn't help but feel that he had been through more than I could ever imagine.

I had an odd feeling, a nagging that these men were not going to leave our little town with out repercussions. Although they made me anxious, I was not frightened. Odd I know, seeing as how they were all heavily armed. I wanted the Captain to know that they were here, that they were interested in his plane.

" ...If you would like to use it, please ask the Captain. The Captain should be in the Rocket. I'm Shera. And what are your names?"

The blonde man introduced himself as Cloud, the man with the gun arm informed me he was Barret, and the dark voice of the last man spoke the name Vincent. I couldn't help but feel relieved.

" So you're not with the Shinra. I thought the approval for the reopening of the Space Program came. " I said with a slight smile.

I got shock in return. Cloud and his companions were rather eager to know why Rufus would be coming here, so I sent them off in the direction of the Captain. I knew I would tell them more than he would have thought wise, but they didn't sense this and they took off with out a second glance. I barely had time to make myself busy when they returned.

"Excuse me... Cloud? Did the Captain say anything?" I didn't quite know what brought them back here so quickly.

" Nope..." Cloud responded flatly.

"Oh?" I knew the Captain better than to think that he hadn't said anything. Or did he just mean he didn't say anything useful. I didn't have time to dwell on this however because Cid came into the house. He glanced around at the men then locked an angry glare on me.

" Shit Shera. What are you blind? We've got guests! GET SOME TEA! Fuck!" He shouted at me.

"I..I'm sorry." I stammered as I busied myself.

" Really, don't mind us." Cloud interjected honorably.

"Shut up! Sit your ass down in that chair and drink your goddamn TEA!" Cid roared, he was under so much stress it was almost impossible for him not to scream all the time. He let out an aggravated growl. "DAMN, I'm pissed! Shera! I'll be in the backyard tunin' up Tiny Bronco! An' make sure to serve them some tea! All right?" He stood abruptly and left out the back door.

The three men stood in the kitchen in stunned silence for a moment.

" ...damn, man. Wassup with that guy's attitude?" Barret commented more to himself than anyone else.

"Sorry. It's our fault." Cloud apologized.

"No, no. He's always like this." I explained with a sigh.

" ...It's amazing that you can live with it. " Vincent's red eyes were locked on the tea pot that sat quietly on the burner.

"No... It's because of my stupid mistake. I was the one who destroyed his dream..." I wished I hadn't said anything at all. I found their curious stares on me and I knew I had no choice but to reveal my crime against him to these strangers. I told them about the rocket, what he had done for me, and why I dedicated my time to do what he asked me to. Cid burst back into the house, seemingly in an even fouler mood than he had been.

"Shera! You still haven't served'em tea! " He snapped at me.

"I..I'm sorry!" I fumbled to make up for lost time.

The Captain sat at the table and propped a muddy boot on the clean table top. He shook his foot restlessly and glared at Cloud.

"Hurry up and sit down! Or ain't my hospitality good enough for you?" He rocked in his seat lightly, his nerves were shot. " They're late... Where is Rufus...?"

In response a voice I had not heard in years sang into the room.

" Hey-HEY! Long time no see! So Cid, how ya been?" Palmer waddled into the house, his cheeks were rosy, he was sporting more pudge, and less hair than I had last seen on him. Cid nearly fell over backwards trying to get up.

"Well, if it ain't fat man, Palmer. How long were you figurin' on keepin' me waitin'? So? When's the Space Program gonna start up again?" The Captain half bellowed.

" Hey-hey! I don't know the President's outside, so why don't you ask him?" Shrugged the tubby older man with an oafish smile. I saw anger storm over Cid's face.

"Fuck! Good for nothing, fat son of a bitch!" He growled as he harshly pushed past the obese man.

" Don't say 'fat'!" Palmer called after Cid. His watery eyes traveled to me and I saw a glint in them. "Hey-hey! Tea! Can I have some too? With lotsa sugar and honey and... oh yeah, don't forget the lard!

I fought back the urge to gag and noticed Cloud and his friends follow Cid outside. I was left here with Palmer all alone, and I felt extremely uncomfortable with how close he was standing to me.

"Mr. Palmer, do you really think that they're going to revive the program?" I asked him as I slyly tried to slink away from him.

"Hey-hey is that plane of his still around here somewhere doll?" He asked pleasantly.

"T..the Tiny Bronco?" I asked forcing the words out. I didn't like where this was going. "Yes, it's just out back..." I didn't have a chance to add the 'why?' by the time he was headed for the back door.

I heard Cid raise his voice outside and chanced a peek. I was right. They wanted to take the Bronco. I could see the Captain's fists shaking. How cruel could they be? How much more could they take from him? Why couldn't they just use the Highwind? Did something happen to the airship? I felt my temper flare. Shinra wasn't going to hurt him anymore. I opened the door and Cloud was right before me.

"Uh, excuse me... This way..." I motioned the trio back into the house. I knew that they were the ones causing the Shinra so much trouble, and if they could get the Bronco...I don't know what sense it made then. I just wanted to know that it wasn't going to Rufus and Palmer without a fight. I led them through the house. "You wanted to use the Tiny Bronco, right? I believe Palmer's going to take it. Why don't you talk to him?"

They took the bait and fought the fat man for control of the plane. In the end Cloud and his friends won but Palmer had been messing with the Bronco and before I could stop it or them, the men latched on to the plane as it started it's lift off. I stared in horror as it swerved through the trees and around the rocket. I rushed through the house, and I wasn't sure why but I grabbed his lance. Rufus and his body guards were watching the scene with the same surprise as I had, the Captain on the other hand looked murderous. I shoved the spear in his hands and he looked at me like he had never seen me before. The Bronco was diving toward us, I swallowed hard... I knew he wouldn't let this one get away from him. The plane screamed over head and as everyone else ducked Cid tore off after it. He leapt into the air and landed square on the biplane's wing. A soldier opened fire on the plane and I heard the bullets connect with the tail of the Bronco. I watched the plane fly away pouring smoke.

The President and his men gave chase, leaving the town in a state of confusion and panic. It was after an hour of nothing that Donnie and I assembled a small group to go seek out answers. The stream of smoke had headed toward the ocean and we followed it. When we got to the water I was both relieved and worried when there was no sign of the plane. There was a slick rainbow colored film on the surface of the stagnant shallow water.

"Gasoline.." Donnie squinted around to try and see if he could find anything else.

After a bit of searching we found a few small scraps of the plane's tail, and discovered the torn up ocean floor. The Bronco had crashed here, but it looked like it wasn't wrecked.

"Did the Shinra take it?" Donnie wondered out loud.

"I don't think so... the tracks head off that way... like it could move through the shallows like a boat." I scanned the waves and saw small traces of more gas further out.

"Then... where's the Captain?"

"He... he must have gone with them."

"What the Shinra?"

"No, the others."

"Why?" Donnie scratched his head as if the action would help him figure it out.

"I don't know... I think they're the ones that are fighting the Shinra, do you really think the Captain would join their fight?" I couldn't see anything.

"After what happened today? I'd be surprised if he didn't." Donnie sighed after a while. "Come on, let's get back to town before it gets dark."

I had trouble with this. It just wasn't sinking in. He was gone. If he had joined Cloud's group... there would be no telling if he would ever make it back here. He could die, and what would I do then? What if he was dead already? When we were settled back into town we all huddled around the television at Nick's bar eagerly awaiting some news. It seemed as if Donnie was right. At around eleven fifteen p.m. the newscaster started a report on the newest attacks by a "growing" band of terrorists. A digitized chart came up on screen, depicting a different face every few seconds. The members of the group were an interesting lot, and I recognized the three I had met today. Cloud's face along with Barret's and Vincent's were joined by a red lion like beast, a pretty young girl with a ravenous smile, a gorgeous woman with a kind face and shocking green eyes, an equally stunning pale skinned woman with long dark brown hair and intense brown eyes, and the last image made a few enthusiastic watchers raise a cheer. The Captain had joined them, he was finally fighting back for what they'd done to him, to all of us. I was so happy to see him there, if he was there he must still be alive. However, again in my foolish stupid way, I was worried that he had seen those striking women and decided to join for a different reason. I shook the thought out of my head, he was alive, that's all I needed to know. I headed back to the empty house and after a moment of hesitation wiped the mud from the table.

----------------------Final Fantasy VII, direct quotes, and all related characters are © Square-enix--------------------------


	4. Chapter 4

The last of the direct quotes and the chapter is a bit longer than nine pages..but I didn't want to interrupt the flow.

Only one chapter left. Thanks for reading and reviewing this far!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Four

We had no direct contact with him, but Cloud and his group were on the news quite often, so we were able to trace their movements through what filtered information we could gain. It was hard to decipher what was really going on because the news reported Shinra's side of the story. So we had no real idea just what was going on most of the time. What was consistent was that Sephiroth was a serious problem, not only to the Captain and his new friends or to Shinra, but the whole world.. This was illustrated extremely well when a few months after the Captain had left, in a rage of fire and thunder a loud explosion sounded from the north. I raced out side to see if the rocket was finally crashing down on us but our troubles were not so simple. Standing outside with the rest of the town we saw the distant sky to the far north flare with an aggressive light. That's when it came. The calm night sky was torn asunder by a fierce flash of red, it swirled menacingly. It was a magic spell, the likes of which we had never seen. It just hung there, high above the world leering at us. It slowly started to form, after a few days it was no longer just a light in the sky, it was a meteor. Or so it wanted to be, it was constructing itself up there, building itself bigger and bigger. Large enough to wipe out all life. It was horrible, I couldn't stand to look at it. I found myself confined in the house trying to stay busy so I didn't have to see it. I know it was stupid, but I still made tea everyday. It helped me cope, like it was only as if he was out slaying Velcher Tusks and would return in only a few minutes. Needless to say a lot of tea was wasted. It kept me calm, even though I was lying to myself to do so. Everyone did not use the tactic I had. There was world wide panic, Sephiroth had called that meteor, and we knew it would kill us all if it came down. I was scared, not only for myself but he was on the front lines, so to speak.

The meteor only swelled in size, and the news covered nothing about Cloud and his friends since the explosion at the northern crater. Shinra was scrambling to come up with anything to keep that massive rock out in space. It seemed out of nowhere but we were ordered to get the rocket into working condition as soon as possible. They planned to launch the rocket packed with super concentrated or "huge" materia, into the meteor. They believed it would destroy the bulk of it and would break it down into smaller meteors that would merely burn up in the planet's atmosphere. With out the Captain around to stop me I set foot in the rocket for the first time in four years to aid in it's tune up. Was our rocket really capable of saving the world? Did Cid know what the company was planning? The 26 was in surprisingly good form, and after we were told it would be put on autopilot, I decided to do as he always told me and leave the oxygen tanks alone. Auto Pilot? Why did I feel like that was not going to happen? I couldn't explain it, but when everyone was working on the routine systems I would sneak off to repair the escape pod.

I knew if the Captain was here, and this was four years ago he'd scold me, but just like I was then, I couldn't ignore it. I had an unshakable feeling that this would be important. Once again we were under watch by the company that had practically shunned us for so long. We had Rude, a bald tan skinned man of the Turks, watching our progress. They were going to launch this rocket as soon as they could. They weren't concerned if it flew the way it was supposed to, they just wanted to smash it into the menace that threatened us all. When I started, I knew the escape pod was in bad shape, but I never imagined how bad it really was. I managed to salvage it to a satisfactory condition, and I was certain it would function properly.

The day came sooner than it felt it should... they loaded up the materia to the right of the cockpit. We were allowed one more time inside the rocket to do maintenance. Though by then we just wanted to wish it good bye. It was so hard to think that it would be destroyed in only a few hours. A panicked worker found me and told me that one of the key devices of the auto pilot was broken. Without hesitation I set to work. It was getting close to lift off, but this was a simple repair, I could do it with out a problem. It was minutes until count down when I finished, I sent a crew member to inform Mr. Palmer that I had fixed it. I think it was the act of working on something that broke so randomly that shook my nerves enough to check the escape pod again. Something was off, my scans were coming back normal, but I wasn't sure if it had anything to do with the ship. It was taking off, going into space, without him. Maybe that was it. It was distant, but I was sure I heard his voice. I didn't have time to investigate however, it seemed as if Palmer had received my message and gone ahead with the launch. The rocket lurched and I braced myself inside the escape pod. The sound was deafening, the force was painful, and I wished I had strapped myself into the harness tighter. I think I blacked out for a few moments because when I regained my senses, it was calm. Was this it? Was this outer space? My scanner beeped at me and told me that the pod was in excellent form. Which meant I didn't have to smash into meteor with the 26, good news for me. Then I heard him again... and I was sure I had heard it.

I released myself from the restraint and my heart galloped in my chest. He was here! He had made it into space after all! He was making his way to the pod with what sounded like two other people. He was in the oxygen tank chamber, only a few feet away from me. I was so excited I might have thrown my arms around himas soon as he came into view, but I heard the explosion instead. My heart stopped beating and I knew what had happened before I saw it. The tank had blown, were they hurt? There came a groan and the clanking of metal.

"Damn! My leg's stuck in the debris... " growled Cid's voice, heavy with pain.

"Cid!" Cloud's voice sounded and echoed through the ship.

I started to run toward the sound. There was the racket of strenuous attempts of lifting the remnant of the tank.

"We can't lift it alone!" Said a female voice laced with worry and aggravation.

"Don't worry 'bout me. Hurry up and go! If you don't hurry, the rocket's gonna crash into Meteor!" The Captain's voice was laden with agony but still stern and commanding.

" ...I can't go without my friends." Cloud answered with finality.

"You shit head! There's no time to worry 'bout other people!" Cid roared.

"I'm gonna do whatever I can. " Cloud's voice was calm and determined.

"You're stupid. You're really fuckin' stupid." The Captain growled. I paused as he spoke again, his voice was soft... and I almost didn't hear him. "Tank Number 8 blew up..." His tone was filled with painful understanding. "So Tank Number 8... really was malfunctioning... Shera... You were right." My heart ached at the hopelessness in his voice. "But, ...this is the end for me."

I was almost to them just a foot away from the door.

"Don't say that, Cid. " I entered the room slightly winded. He was trapped under a large hunk of metal that had been Tank 8. He was barely visible beyond the debris, but I saw him blink at me testing his vision.

"Shera? "

"I tagged along. I'm coming to help you" I finally had the urge to take my eyes off him and saw Cloud and the beautiful young woman with the long dark brown hair trying to free him. I took my place between them.

" You stupid reckless fuck head! " He shouted at me, but I saw that glint that had been absent from his eyes for so long. He locked his eyes on me with sorrow. "... sorry."

I put in everything I had and I felt our combined strength lift the debris. We got him out and managed to get him into the escape pod with little difficulty. I began the process of ejecting the pod as Cloud and woman, who the Captain and Cloud called Tifa, strapped themselves in.

"Hey, Shera! Does this pod really fly?" Cid's voice came from behind me, sounding anxious and trying to hide his pain. His leg was torn up pretty bad.

"It'll be okay. I've been checking it till now. " I answered as I punched in the code to close the hatch.

"...Then I'm relieved."

I turned to him and saw the relief in his eyes, I felt a blush creep over my face.

"...thanks."

I hit the timed ejection button and quickly strapped myself in. He was watching me carefully, like a hawk actually, and I felt my face redden deeper. The pod removed itself from the main shuttle smoothly and we swivelled around in the weightlessness of space, the small window filling with stars. Cid stared out the opening, in the fashion of a child pressing his nose against the glass of a candy store. I couldn't help but smile.

"So this is... outer space... Man... it's the real thing... I'm really here in outer space... " He said in a daze, the celestial display swimming past his eyes. He suddenly got serious, Cloud and Tifa leaned over each other to see what was happening. "So long. Shinra No. 26..." The Captain stated in a fashion of a commander sending his troops out to battle.

It happened just like they planned it. The rocket hit the meteor, smacked it into smaller pieces. But, as we were approaching the atmosphere we noticed it was rebuilding itself. It was all for nothing. Reentry was rough and we landed violently in the ocean. Cloud opened the hatch and the sky above still glowed with the red light of the meteor. I felt so out of place, I didn't know what they had been doing, what they hoped to gain by getting on the shuttle. Tifa nudged Cloud gently with a glance at Cid than me, climbed out onto the surface of the pod and he followed her taking out a cell phone as he went. I finally removed the restraints.

"Ya called me Cid up there... I don't recall you ever callin' me by my name more than once before." He had his eyes closed.

"I.. I guess I was just was surprised.."

"I didn't say I minded." He rubbed his eyelids. "I guess I'm the stupid one huh? You were right all along. If I had gone up four years ago..."

"How is your leg?" I asked him, not wanting to hear what could have happened.

"Hurts. But we got some materia that'll fix it right as rain. Just gotta wait for the Highwind to get here," He said dismissively.

"You got back the Highwind?" I cried unable to hide my joy.

"You bet your ass I did." His eyes opened and my enthusiasm was greeted by the crooked smile I had fallen in love with. "They messed her up a bit, added some switches and shit but, she's still there."

"Oh Captain, that's wonderful!" My grin was big and goofy but I didn't care.

"Yeah... but I gotta wonder how long we've got to use her." He frowned slightly. "This whole Sephiroth business is worse than you can imagine. I've seen what he can do..." His eyes looked through me with a sadness in them, "...the bastard's shown us so many times. Things are lookin' real bad."

"Don't give up Captain... if anyone can stop him, it's your new friends."

"Kids..." He laughed. His eyes saw me again. "The lot of 'em are just numbskull kids, but we have gotten pretty far I suppose."

We didn't speak for a while, the waves lapped around us and we could hear Cloud and Tifa talking above us. I wanted to tell him, tell him I loved him, wanted to try my hand at kissing him again. When he spoke my name I nearly jumped out of my skin,

"Shera... I'm sorry." He didn't make eye contact. "I never should have been so hard on you... said all those..."

"Captain... don't. It's all right. I understand."

"It's not all right!" He snapped at me. "How can you be so understanding? Why didn't you try to kill me in my sleep for what I did to you when you knew you were right all this time?"

"I didn't know Captain! I thought I had just been over cautious..."

"Well... thank you." He said sweetly. I bit my lip with a blush. "I really don't deserve to have a person like you to depend on."

The airship came into view and we were quickly rescued from the bobbing of the ocean. Being back inside the airship filled me with a tingling warmness that I hadn't felt in so long. The past few years were like nothing more than a bad dream that I had finally been awoken from. The rest of the group was on the airship and I recognized the faces I had seen from that first news report. There was one face missing, that of the young woman with green eyes. Cid was taken to the meeting room where he was healed. He and I were left alone after the magic had taken full effect.

"How well does the Highwind run when it's so short handed?" I asked him trying to be as sly as possible.

"You're going back to the town." He said keen to my game.

"But!" I started.

"I mean it. You're not coming." He said flatly as he tested his freshly healed leg.

"I can help you!"

"I know you'd be amazing up here, but you're place is there."

"But.. What if you die!" I choked on the last word.

"I don't intend to, not yet anyway."

The argument ended there. I couldn't convince him otherwise. I found myself back at the town in only a few minutes, and was faced with being separated from him again. I tried in vain to change his mind but he brushed me off.

"Say hi to the gang for me." He said as he removed me from the vessel. "I'll be seein' ya."

I watched the airship depart numbly. When it was no longer visible I trekked back to the Rocket-less Rocket town. I was greeted with surprise and happiness from the townspeople. I had to recount what had happened to them. They were all so glad to hear the Captain was well that Nick's bar was packed to the gills for the rest of the evening with drinks on the house. I, on the other hand, returned to Cid's house. I sat at the kitchen table, and got lost in my worried mind about what they were going to do next.

No rest came for me or the world. When the meteor was summoned the planet awakened it's own counter attack. Ancient enormous monsters simply called WEAPON were dispatched to eliminate what was causing the world so much anguish. Unfortunately for us, humans were the biggest threat within their line of fire. So on top of the evil Sephiroth had unleashed, we now had to worry about these five beasts bigger than any city, that existed only to remove us from the planet we had poisoned. One was killed by the giant cannon that was attached to the military port town of Junon, but the rest remained to wander freely. There wasn't much time left. Meteor was coming, it was only a few days away from smashing into us, and we knew it. Shinra felt that if they could get to Sephiroth they might be able to stop it, Cid and his friends must have had the same idea too. But the SOLDIER was not careless, he had encased the sanctuary of his lair deep in the northern crater with an impenetrable barrier spell. But wasn't it believed that the WEAPONs were also impenetrable? Shinra apparently thought the same way I did and arranged for the massive canon from Junon to be modified and attached onto Midgar.

It was all done quickly, and the city now had a Mako canon the likes of which the world had never seen. We watched the news for constant updates, our nerves were raw, and more than a few of us had suffered from emotional breakdowns. The preparations were complete when the camera panned up suddenly, there she was. The Highwind was speeding toward Midgar, a confused hush fell over the lot of us crammed around the bar's television. They were there... he was there. The airship soared over the city, as it did so we saw people jumping over board, my heart caught in my throat. Parachutes erupted in the distant sky like puffy fireworks. I could barely believe what I was seeing, the Highwind continued on it's path as it's passengers floated down into the frantic city. The newscaster was giving some award winning monolog I'm sure, but I couldn't hear over my fear. I saw it even before the cameraman did.

"WEAPON!" I screamed and jammed my finger at the televison. I couldn't breathe as I was surrounded by screams and shouting. It was gigantic and it was rumbling toward Midgar with a mission.

I stood and fought my way to the door. I came out into the harsh night light of the meteor the air was thick with my panic. I had to go, I had to help him, my arm was seized by a strong hand. Donnie wheeled me around and stared surprised into my frantic eyes.

"What are you doing?" He asked me.

"I have to go to Midgar! I have to help him!" I tried to break away.

"Don't be an idiot! You'd never make it and if you did you'd be killed!" He shook me, trying to reawaken my senses.

"I can't just sit here!"

"You're not going. Just calm down, the Captain is in good company. He'll be fine." He held me in place.

"No I have to save him! It's the only thing I'm good at! I can't loose him!" I was hysterical, my emotional break down had finally caught up with me.

"Hey... hey, get a hold of yourself! There's nothing you can do this time... You've got to believe in him."

My meltdown was, thankfully, only seen by Donnie. He was always there when I needed him, he grounded me and tried to beat sense back into my head. I didn't think about then but now I wonder if he had deeper feelings than friendship for me. He knew I would be a mess in a few minutes and brought me back to the Captain's house. It used to smell like him, used to retain his smoke and cologne now it just smelled like me. I tried so hard to remember what he smelt like, it was there subconsciously but I couldn't pull it back up to the surface. I found Donnie handing me a glass and some pills.

"Sleeping pills." He explained to my runny face. "You haven't been sleeping well and if you stay awake I'll have to get people to guard you to be sure you don't try anything crazy."

"Donnie..."

"Take them. If anything happens we'll get you." He ruffled my hair lightly and watched me until I took the pills. He ushered me toward Cid's room, I stopped.

"My bed is in..." I started but he opened the door.

"Your 'bed' is a hard cot, that is only adding to your sleeping problem. You can't keep this room like a shrine to him Shera. He'd want you to use it... I know he would." He explained gently and firmly. "Get some sleep okay? If the others see you like this we'll all fall apart."

I stared at his bed, untouched for so long. With a small nod, I wiped my wet face on the sleeve of my shirt.

"There's a good girl." He smiled but it was a sad smile. He left the room and closed the door behind him.

I curled up on top of the sheets that faintly held the ghost of his fragrance. Why did I feel so lost? Donnie was right, I should have faith in him... but WEAPON? I closed my eyes and a few droplets soaked Cid's blankets. The medicine was taking effect quickly, probably because I didn't eat that much in recent days, my nerves wouldn't allow me to. I had a nightmare filled slumber, unable to wake up, I suffered through horrors that I cannot recount. When I broke out of their grip I was curled up even tighter on the Captain's deshabilled bed. It was the early hours of the morning. Too soon for even the sun to wake up but, I rubbed the sleep out of my crusty eyes anyway. I sat up and the door opened a crack.

I held my breath, was it him? Had he returned when I was out? Donnie appeared in the slowly opening door, he held a letter in one hand and a serious frown on his face. My heart fell, he entered the room and sat on the foot of the bed. With out looking at me he handed me the letter.

"It's from your mom."

I turned over the envelope in my hands. Her elegant handwriting was blotched with dark ink stains. I hadn't heard from her since I returned to Rocket Town, I opened it carefully. The letter was short and the inked words were diluted by the falling tears of the writer. I swallowed hard and read the letter. My brother Evan had gone into Midgar, they hadn't heard from him in weeks, she was worried beyond what she could form into words. She must have written this when the Shinra were still constructing the canon. She wanted me to find out where he was, if he was well, if I could, if I still had friends in the city. She apologized to me. It felt shallow but it was still an apology, no doubt my father had made her. I reached the end of the letter and saw Donnie holding his head in his hands.

"... what happened?" I asked as a lump formed in my throat.

"Shinra... it's gone." He said as if he couldn't find the right words.

"What do you mean it's gone?"

"WEAPON... it attacked... the Shinra building... all it's inhabitants... they're dead."

I felt like I was hit in the face with a brick. This had to be a nightmare... I hadn't woken up.

"W..what about the Captain?" I asked, not sure I wanted an answer.

"We lost all coverage after Midgar was attacked... there's been nothing... I'm sorry."

I looked at the letter again not sure what to do, what to feel.

"I think... you should go be with your family. If your brother was really in Midgar... he might not have made it out..."

It was devastating. I couldn't imagine that two people so close to me could be gone so quickly. He was right, if Evan hadn't escaped... I needed to be there for my parents... they needed to be there for me. I prayed that Evan was safe... I had a feeling that he would have fled

the second there was a hint of danger, but Cid... was he in the building when... ? Donnie was watching me, I patted his shoulder gently.

"I'm going to need a way to get to Kalm..."

"We've had an overflow of Helicopters come in, all the airborne crafts that were out when... well, some of them came here... the rest went to Junon. Someone will help you." He looked like he was fighting to keep quiet.

"What is it? Do you have something else to tell me?" I asked calling his discomfort.

"No. Not yet." Was all he said.

I found a pilot quickly and was on my way back to Kalm before noon. Just flying through the air we could tell that the world had changed. It was maddeningly quiet, the Meteor was right above us... close enough it seemed like the rotor would scrape against the bottom of the rock in a few minutes. It was almost about to come crashing down on us... I did the math in my head... It looked like it was aimed at Midgar.

Kalm hadn't changed. People seemed to be in a state of denial and blind optimism. I was greeted by a few who remembered me from when my mother introduced us. I had to give them credit , seeing as how I looked nothing at all like the squeaky clean doll I had been. I knocked on the front door and my brother Steven's wife answered. I had met her only a handful of times before but she hugged me like I was her own sister. Steve came and pried his sobbing wife off me and gave me a hug of his own.

"Have you heard anything?" I asked.

"He's home." He smiled lightly.

I smiled in return and entered the house, it seemed so small, so different. Evan had been true to my instincts and though he now had a broken nose and leg, he was safe. He greeted me with a hug and a kiss when I sat beside him on the bed. My father followed his suit, my mother simply smiled. Evan told me about his action packed escape from the crumbling city. I had to wonder how much of it was embellished. He went into such detail and had apparently told the story so many times that everyone else was eager to leave us together.

"Evan... did you see any parachutes?" I asked.

"Parachutes?" He blinked, like the word was jogging his memory. "Ya know... I think I did. Before everything went to hell there were a bunch of them. Why?"

"You don't know if you saw any of those people did you?"

"Don't think so, I was runnin' in the other direction. Why? What's eatin' ya sis?" He locked his brown eyes on me.

"It's nothing. I'm so glad you're okay." I smiled, hiding my worry.

It was over dinner the following evening that I told them that I deduced that Meteor was going to hit Midgar. I asked them to come back to Rocket Town with me, there would be enough room for them and they would be far away from the impact.

"No offense Shorty," that's what Steve had called me since I was five. "But I don't think it matters where we are. That thing is going to come down and mess things up, it doesn't matter how far you go."

He was right, but... I don't know. Rocket Town... it made me feel safe. That was my home, I missed it now, even though I knew there was no one there waiting for me. My mother was looking at me as if she could read my thoughts. I lowered my eyes onto my barely disturbed plate.

"You look tired Shera, honey." My dad said worry crinkling the lines around his eyes.

"I am, I think I'm going to sleep now."

"Sleep?" Evan asked incredulously, the bandaged nose making his voice sound funny. "Don't waste your time sis! If we're gunna die soon we may as well hit up the bar! C'mon! We'll light up the town! The Olsen kids will go out in style!" He smiled around the table.

"Sorry. I don't feel all that well." I said apologetically, took my plate and left the room.

They watched me go and it was a few moments until they were talking loudly again. I scraped the surplus of uneaten food into the trash and placed my dishes in the sink. I felt so empty, I was a horrible person. I should have been beside myself with joy that my brother was alive, but my thoughts were constantly on the fate of the Captain.

"He stayed here for a bit after you left that night..." My mother's voice made me jump. She was walking toward me, her eyes on the dirty dishes. "You're blonde co-worker."

"I...I know." I said tearing my eyes away from her. We hadn't really talked since I came back.

"I saw him on the news... he's one of those terrorists now." She said plainly.

"He's not a..." I started angrily but I saw she hadn't meant it to come out like that.

"You hurt him very badly." She said as she turned on the water and grabbed the dish soap. "But he told me that I was worse than you ever were."

"He did?" I habitually grabbed a towel.

"I just wanted to save you from a lonely life. I never lived like you so I didn't know how you could be happy doing things I didn't. He accused me of destroying you... he told me if you brought any dresses back to the base he'd come back and the conversation would be far less civil. It wasn't civil to begin with."

"I didn't."

"I know. He knew you wouldn't either... I think that's why he said it. Dear, I'm sorry. I never should have let it go this long. I didn't think that..."

"It's okay." I dried my plate and placed it on the shelf where it lived.

"You love him." It wasn't a question. I couldn't find the words to answer her, she smiled gently. "I could tell from the second he came in the house. I didn't want you to go off with some strange angry man... which was selfish. I know that now. It's not my decision who you end up with... are you two still close?"

"H.." My eyes filled with tears and I desperately tried to choke them back. "He.. Might be dead."

She stared at me as I fought to control myself. My bottom lip was trembling and I bit it to try and regain my composure.

"Oh Shera..." She hugged me.

"I want to believe he's alive... t.. that he made it out like Evan... but I can't mom, I can't."

"He won't come here to find you." She said gently. "You've got to go home, he'd be there, worried about you."

"B...but what about you... and.."

"We'll be fine dear. Seeing you these past few days, we knew you were distracted. It's so good to see you... but you're heart is somewhere else." She wiped the few stray tears that had swelled over my defenses. "We'll see you off tomorrow morning."

"Thanks mom."

I was off on my way home quicker than I expected. My family told me they loved me and sent me off with smiles. I was so anxious to get back, I could swear my heart beat had been replaced with a frantic "please be there, please be there". The helicopter landed outside the town and I thanked the pilot as I frantically scrambled out of the chopper. I walked into the unchanged town. No one was outside, was that a good sign? I rushed to the house... it was dark and looked empty.

"Shera?" Donnie caught up to me winded.

"Donnie, have you heard anything?"

His eyes became sad and he put a hand on my shoulder.

"Come look."

My heart froze. No, what had happened? He opened the door and I was terrified. Please don't let him show me his body.. Oh god.. I would die. He turned on the kitchen light and I saw a mess. I blinked. Empty liquor bottles and cigarette butts were everywhere. Over the strange odors, I found it... it smelt like him.

"He was here." Donnie said sadly as he brushed some empty bottles into a trash can.

"Where is he now? Is he at the bar?" I asked nearly jumping out of my skin. He shook his head.

"He's gone."

"G..gone?" I repeated weakly as I collapsed into an empty chair at the table.

"He left late last night..."

"Where? Where was he going? Is that helicopter still out there?" I asked sitting up straight. I would not be defeated so easily. If that stupid rock was going to kill me I wanted to die in his arms. Donnie shook his head again.

"It turns out that the canon was able to fire before WEAPON destroyed it, the blast tore through the monster killing it and went on to destroy Sephiroth's barrier."

"He... they wouldn't..." I stammered.

"They were going down there today to face him. He wanted to... he wanted to see us all one last time." He looked at me miserably.

"But... but he... I mean... I wasn't... Donnie..." I took a sharp intake of breath as I felt my bottom lip shaking.

Donnie sat across from me and pulled out an envelope from his pant pocket. He eyed it and turned it over in his dirty hands.

"When you asked me the other day if I had something else to tell you... I did. But what I had to tell you wasn't from me. He told me not to say anything until he was dead... and I wasn't sure he was then. I guess I was right... but I didn't expect him to come back when you were gone. Nether did he." He slid the envelope toward me. "He gave this to me before he left last night. Don't read it until I leave... But what he told me not to tell you may not be in there. It was a long time ago he made me promise to keep my big mouth shut so he may have forgotten."

I took the letter slowly as he let out a heaving sigh.

"We never went to Midgar to see Palmer that day we went to your house."

I stopped. My brain could barely work above a crawl at this point.

"He was a mess when you weren't here after the screwed up launch... he thought that if you were gone that he'd be able to push all his anger off on you and move on. He couldn't. Shera, I've known him a long time and I had never seen him act so strangely. From the first day you came here, he was different. Nothing drastic, at first I thought that he was glad you were as good as everyone made you out to be but... I soon figured it was deeper than that. After you left, after he drove you away... he was useless. We couldn't talk to him with out having to repeat ourselves five times until he snapped at us and stormed off. He missed you. At that point he was so full of anger and resentment toward you he wouldn't admit to it. I took it upon myself to confront him. I've never told anyone any of this before, but after he denied it for a while... he admitted it. He told me how messed up it all was, he didn't know why he missed you, I had to tell him." Donnie sighed again. "I knew we wouldn't get him back until you returned, so I told him we were going to get you. He came up with the Palmer story and swore me to stick to it. I wanted to tell you when you asked me that very night... but he would have killed me." Donnie raised his eyes to mine. "Now you know."

"Donnie... I..."

He stood and started toward the door.

"I've got to get going... you read that letter 'kay?" He left with out letting me say anything.

I looked at the white envelope covered in dirt smudges and oily fingerprints. My fingers gently opened the paper casing of what might be the last thing I ever read. The letter was equally dirty and I immediately recognized his unruly handwriting. I got choked up and had to take a deep breath before I read it.

"Shera,

What the hell? I came all the way back here to see you an' your sorry ass is off with the walrus woman? Sorry... what I meant to write was. "I hope your brother is okay." Shit. I really wanted to see you. I'm sure Donnie's told ya what fool headed thing we're gunna do, that is unless you never get this. But if you don't get this and someone else is reading it GET YOUR FUCKING NOSE IN YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS! But if you are... I wanna let you know that before I left the ship, our "fearless leader" Cloud told us not to come back unless we had a reason to fight, something we were willing to die to protect. I could have stayed on the ship when I heard him say that cuz' I already have one. It's you. I know, I know, you're probably thinking if that were true I'd never treat ya the way I did... I'm sorry about that. I really, really am. I didn't stay on the Highwind (who's runnin' better than ever, so ya know) when Spikey gave us his little speech because I wanted to see you. We're going into the mouth of madness itself and I don't know if lady luck will be on my side or not this time. Come to think of it... she's you. You've been my saving grace so many times... you saved me the time the 26 almost went up and when I got trapped up there, you were my lady luck. But you also made my decision for me when Cloud an' the rest of his idiot gang were takin' the Bronco... I didn't know what to do. There you were, you gave me my spear and told me to go with your eyes. As it turns out, though it's been rough as hell, I was supposed to do this. So how about it lady luck? Will we see each other again? I'll be sure to kick Sephiroth an extra time for you... I really wanted to see you, but I know you'll get this... cross your fingers and say a lil' prayer. Maybe I'll get back to ya in one piece.

Thank you for everything,

Cid."

I put my head down on the dirty table and cried. Lady luck? Me? I was the lucky one. His words sounded so hopeless, why did I have to leave? I should have been here... They were already in that crater... they'd probably been in there for hours. They might be nothing more than the first casualties of the apocalypse at this point. He wanted to see me, he said, but he couldn't possibly want to see me more than I wanted to see him now. It wasn't written, I might have imagined it, but to me all the words he wrote... though they said what they said... I could feel something underneath them. I love you. I closed my eyes and prayed. I prayed to anything that would listen, I was a woman of science... I know faith and science are more like oil and water but I prayed like a nun. I called out to any angel I could, I even went as far too ask the Highwind to protect him. I was so useless stuck here, but I would only be more useless down in the center of the world with him. The bottles and cups in the cabinets started to rattle. I lifted myself up from the shaking table and found my way out side. It was happening.

Even though an ocean separated the continents, we could see it. The Meteor was through the atmosphere and was making it's descent. If it had been a regular natural meteor it would have taken only a few seconds to collide and wipe us out, but it was a magic spell. It hung over the world menacingly taunting us. The shaking told us that it was destroying something... Midgar. It would be over in only a few minutes. I felt a hand grab mine. Donnie had his horror filled eyes unblinkingly locked on the calamity. I closed my eyes and recalled Cid's face... if this was happening, my luck hadn't helped anything. We braced ourselves for the end. I thanked Donnie for being my closest friend and he gave my hand a supportive squeeze.

A massive concussion sent us all falling to the floor. I looked up, my back pressed flat against the grass and saw a mass of brilliant white-blue light scream toward the meteor. It left floating spots over my vision, what was it? I heard people shouting around me and sat up. The light was blocking meteor, trying to push it back up into space... or was it destroying it? Whatever it was trying to do... the light flickered helplessly... were we too late to even be saved by miracles? Then it started. Green wispy beams of light streamed across the sky and as they passed over head the ground around us greeted them with more. We were surrounded by these lights as they danced around each other and quickly rushed to the aid of the white light. It was so beautiful... I didn't know what any of it meant... but I knew it wanted to keep us. The planet wanted humans to say. A huge explosion of light burned my eyes and the town was filled with painful cries. I held my eyes shut but my eyelids were not thick enough to block out all the light. A warm wind blew through the town and the light was gone.

I flinched and blinked my eyes open as a hand helped me to my feet. Donnie came back into view and he shared my surprise. It was gone. Meteor, the lights, gone like they never existed to begin with. It took a second but the townspeople exploded into cheers. We were alive... we were alive.

There was a party that very instant, and I was sure the rest of the world had also done the same. I found little comfort in the future. I wanted to be happy, I knew that he had died for this... but. I didn't want to live without him. After I shared a few drinks with the gang I snuck away to the house. His letter was on the table still. I picked it up and read it again. Had my luck saved us? Was I even lucky at all? I regretted so much... I wanted to kiss him. Wanted to know what that felt like. Now, I could only find him in my dreams. I wasn't going to kill myself. I knew that I would have to respect his sacrifice and help rebuild what we could. I felt like my heart had been ripped out... I silently moved into his room. As soon as I opened the door I was reunited with the smell of cigarettes and his crisp cologne. He had probably slept in here when he came the other day, even if it was only for a few hours... while he waited to see if I'd come home.

I curled up on his bed, taking in what I knew time would only strip away too soon. I had to carry on, I knew I would have to be strong... but it didn't have to be today.

-----Final fantasy VII, direct quotes, and all related characters are © Square-Enix-----


	5. Chapter 5

Here it is! The final chapter! Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and supporting me! I would like to write a sequel but we'll see if my muse is willing! Hope you enjoyed this story as much as I loved writing it! (Yay for Cid and Shera fans!) :D

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter Five

The next few days brought us news that the green lights were life stream, the very life of the planet itself. The white light was said to be some super powerful spell that an ancient race called the Cetra had created to counter meteor. By the will of god and the planet we were spared. It also came to our attention that the WEAPONs were all taken out by an unknown force, we all agreed it was probably the Captain and his friends. I tried to act interested when people would come to the house to give me the news, I would make them tea and they would tell me how well I was taking things. I fooled them. As soon as I was left alone I would cry again. Not immobilizing sobs, but I cried. I had finally cleaned up the last of the remains of the party they had when Cid had said good bye. The house was clean, clean and lonely. It would be a feeling I would have to get used to. I heard someone come in as I was putting the last of the cleaning supplies away.

"Word came in from Kalm that they're all okay over there. They said a lot of people had gotten out of Midgar..." Donnie sat at the table. "They also said that there was a film crew that managed to get enough equipment to start broadcasting again... so we should be able to hear what really happened. Oh." He ruffled through his pockets. "You got a letter from your mom too. Maybe.." He paused. "Maybe you should get out of this house for a little bit, go stay with them for a while?"

"I'm fine Donnie." I faced him trying to be as convincing as possible. "I'll be sure to see them as soon as I can, but I just need a little more time."

"I hope so kiddo." He responded taking me in doubtfully. "Well, they're talking about building a new town to accommodate the people who don't homes anymore. They wanna keep it close to Midgar but not too close to Kalm... that's all they've got so far. Maybe we should volunteer to help?"

"Sounds like a good idea. We could really help them get their lives back..." I had to admit the thought did help me cope.

"I'll look into it and let you know." He stood. "Oh and I've noticed this place is like grand central station lately..."

"Yeah, people just can't seem to get enough of me." I shrugged with a weak smile.

"Maybe because you always give them hope. We're real lucky to have you."

"Lady luck that's me." I said weakly.

"Lady luck huh? Well if you ever tire of entertaining feel free to lock the front door. I have a feeling they won't leave you alone until you do." He left.

Again and again I find myself saying this... Donnie was right. People poured through the door every few minutes and I was down to my last three tea bags, not to mention the dirty dishes. It was dark when the last band of visitors had left. I shook my head with a light smile as I inspected the mountain of cups I had to tackle. I was completely out of clean cups. I wasn't upset, washing and drying them would keep me busy enough to keep my mind from wandering. I found myself going into dazes, I couldn't help but think about what the new town they wanted would be like. It would have to be huge to sustain all those people. Donnie said he'd get back to me... that was hours ago. I was kind of eager to hear more news about that, it was the only thing I had to focus on that didn't remind me of him. I heard someone walk into the house but barely noticed, I was thinking of who would take the place of Shinra, if anyone would at all. I heard a slap of leather on the table and an odd clunk that pulled me out of my thoughts. I turned to see who was there and found myself immediately locked in a kiss.

My skin tingled and my knees shook. He tasted like stale smoke, his scruff dragged across my skin like sand paper, his lips were cracked and dry, and his calloused bare hand slid around to the back of my head. I know it sounds awful, but it was enough to make me swoon with ecstacy. I had to grab onto the counter behind me to keep myself from collapsing. I had waited so long for this kiss, I was only able to close my eyes. He kissed me with his whole heart, and I had to fight to stay standing. This couldn't be real... My face was hot and I was sure it was redder than a tomato when he drew away from me.

"Breathin's important now..." He said quietly as his thumb traced my bottom lip. I hadn't realized I'd stopped breathing, but my chest was tight even when I let out the trembling breath. "There ya go..." Said his playful voice and I felt his lips press against my cheek.

Then he was gone. I was shaking all over. Swallowing hard I collected my courage and opened my eyes. No one was in front of me. My face was sore from his stubble, my heart swelled bigger with each beat, I could still taste him, I held onto the counter to keep standing, and my skin still tingled. Was I going crazy? I let out another quavering breath and saw what had made those odd sounds. A worn pair of dark brown leather gloves and a pair of aviation goggles lay abandoned on the table. My eyes wandered around the house and I saw that his bedroom door was open. Steading my shaking knees I approached the room and looked in.

Cid was collapsed on his bed. I stared at him. He was sleeping. I couldn't do anything but watch him, afraid if I blinked he'd disappear. He was still fully clothed apart from what he had deposited on the table. I stepped in and gently removed his boots. They were filthy, as was he, and I ran the dirt between my fingers... the sensation of the grains was so real. I blinked a few times and rested my fears, he was still there, I wasn't dreaming. I could tell he had become more muscular since he left with Cloud, he seemed so much stronger, even though he was just asleep. He was dirty, and sporting a few new cuts and bruises on what of him I could see. I wanted to wake him up, wanted to make sure he was real, but I sat on the floor with my back to the wall across from his bed. I felt like I was stuck in a wonderful memory, the kind that you remember until your dying breath. I felt my lips gently with my fingertips, had he really kissed me? All the exhaustion I had denied myself, all the heartache that had ripped me apart, caught up to me and I fell asleep where I sat.

"SHERA! SHERA!"

I jumped awake at the sound of Donnie screaming my name. I blinked and tried to remember where I was. There was a groan.

"Goddamn it what the hell is wrong with you people..."

I remembered. Cid looked at me with one eye.

"What the hell are you doin' down there?"

Donnie appeared in the open door, saw me, and then locked his eyes on the bed's inhabitant.

"CAPTAIN! You are back!" Donnie's face broke into a grin the size of the Shinra 26. "I saw your new lance outside and I couldn't believe it!"

"Go away." Cid growled as he put a pillow over his head. "Goddamn it I just helped save the fuckin' world an' I can't even get enough quiet to sleep."

"Sorry." Donnie whispered but his smile didn't flinch. "I'll let everyone know that you're back and grumpy as ever."

"Fuck off..."

"It's great to have you back Captain."

"... Good to be back. Now shut up."

I stifled my laughter and Donnie left. A corner of the pillow that hid his face lifted up and through the shadow I saw his beautiful blue eyes on me. I bit my lip to try to hide my smile.

"Laughin'?" His tone was unreadable. After all this was he really going to be upset with me for laughing at him? He blinked tiredly. "I haven't heard you laugh in a long time." He stretched his legs out and I heard his spine crack. With a light moan he rolled onto his back.

"You saved my ass again. Down there in the crater... we got him. Smacked the sonofabitch around real good. But we were trapped..."

My smile faded. He rubbed his eyelids.

"I think I said it out loud... 'Lady Luck don't fail me now...' ya didn't." He scratched his messy head, sending his hair further into chaos. "The Highwind threw herself into the crater and we managed to get out just in time... she's not how she used to look and pretty beat up... but she got us out."

"Where... where were you these last few days? If you got out before that light..."

"After Holy and the life stream stopped meteor, we tried to get as many people out of the ruins of Midgar as we could... I think Cloud, Barret, and Tifa are still there now... it's a real mess..."

"I..." I fixed my eyes on my knees. "I thought you were dead."

"Disappointed?" He raised an eyebrow at me.

"No!" I shouted and I quickly bit my lip embarrassed.

He laughed and sat up. He cracked his neck and slicked his hands through his hair. My face was still sensitive from his scratchy kiss and I couldn't contain myself anymore.

"Captain... about last night..."

"I kissed you." He looked at me, knowing I questioned my memory.

"W...why?" I asked feeling the blush creep over me again.

"Because you're too shy to do it yourself." He slid off the bed and sat on the floor across from me. He brushed my hair away from my eyes with a gentle touch. "Go on... lay one on me." He gave me his charming crooked smile. I felt my stomach twist into knots, he laughed lightly. "See? What'd I tell ya?" He moved his face toward mine.

"W..wait I have to tell you something..." I breathed and he stopped, only a few inches parted us.

"Stallin'?" His hand ran along the side of my neck.

"I... I love you." I stammered. After all those years I had held it inside me, to let it out was like releasing a breath held in too long. He blinked at me.

"That's it?" He said with a cocked eyebrow.

"What?" I couldn't believe it. How could he be so cold? So uncaring... he saw my anger and his smile turned nervous.

"No, no, wait now... don't get mad. It's just... I knew that."

"Y..you did?" I felt so foolish.

"Unless you just realized it... which I think we both know you haven't." He sat back leaning against the bed frame.

"But I never told anyone..." I searched my memory, I was certain.

"Come on now... you practically told me everyday." He sneered.

"I did?" I replied in horror.

"I never saw you blush so much around anyone else.. Or s..s..stutter as much." He teased.

"T... that doesn't..."

"Ya just did it again." He smiled.

"H... how long have you...?"

"Probably as soon as you got off that plane and saw me for the first time." He put on an arrogant smirk. "Was I really that good lookin'?"

I blushed and avoided answering him.

"So you've known all this time..."

"I wondered sometimes, but at the end of the day, I knew."

"Captain... when you k... when you kissed me..." I couldn't believe this was happening. "And in your letter... you.."

"So ya did get it? I wasn't sure if ya would. Is your brother okay?"

"He's fine..." I shook my head to reprimand him for interrupting me. He must know how difficult this was for me.

"That's good. Didn't bring back any of those dresses did you?" He eyed me carefully.

"No. I have to..." I started again with annoyance, I wanted to ask him something why wouldn't he just let me talk?

"Good they're not your style... though that purple one you were wearin' looked amazing on you."

"Captain..."

"I'm not saying to go get it or nothing. That wasn't you back there, she was trying to change you. I would have skinned her myself if she wasn't some kinda endangered species."

"CAPTAIN..."

"All right I'm sorry, but she's not the nicest of large aquatic mammals. Really I've seen a lot of things these past few months but nothing was as unnaturally annoying as your..."

"CID DO YOU LOVE ME?" I shouted but shrunk in fright as soon as I did. He blinked at me. I wanted to curl up in a ball and turn invisible.

"You kiddin'?" His forehead wrinkled in confusion. "What do I have to do spell it out for you?" He grumbled. "You gotta have people fuckin' tell you things out right... take you by the hand and..."

"So... what are you saying?" What was he rambling about?

"Yes." He sighed in annoyance. " I tried like hell not too..." He crossed his arms and coyly put his eyes on me. "But... yes I love you. Happy now?"

I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him. I felt his shock but he put his arms around me and looked into my eyes.

"Well... what happened to Ms. Shy? Maybe I was wrong about you?" He smiled.

"When did you start?" My world had fallen away, we were the only people left in my eyes. He rolled his.

"All these questions..." He teased.

I kissed him again... it was a feeling I was sure would never loose it's sweetness.

"Okay. You twisted my arm." He faked a grimace. "I guess I realized it completely when I saw you in the rocket when we were in space. But when did I suspect it? Probably... when I took you around on your first night and saw that Velcher Tusk standin' behind you. I don't know... I just panicked. I never used to panic before you came around and started shakin' things up."

"So... if you loved me... why did you turn away from me when.. I tried to kiss you?" It was a hard question. One I had no answer to myself.

"I thought I was going into space... thought you'd be better off with out havin' to wait for me to come back, if I didn't die. That and like I said I tried like hell not to love you. I was the Captain after all... what would people think?" He looked so tired. I was sure he was exhausted, after all he had just been through, it would be scary if he wasn't. " I guess I really shook ya last night huh?" He closed his weary eyes.

"I barely heard you come in... people were coming in all day and we all thought you'd been killed in the crater..." I laid my head on his chest and heard the steady beating of his heart.

"Psh. Figures. I half expected you to smack me."

"Did you want me to?" I traced his Adam's apple with my index finger.

"What the hell kind of question is that! Of course I didn't want you to smack me!"

I shifted in his loving arms, put my hands on either side of his face, and turned it down toward me. He opened his eyes a crack as if to make sure I wasn't going to hit him. I committed him to memory, I wanted to remember him as he was that day, the day he said he loved me. I closed my eyes and kissed him. I wasn't afraid anymore, I knew I wasn't alone in my affection. I opened my heart up to him and he accepted it with open arms, it was more than a kiss. I had devoted my life to him already, but now he had given his to me.

I don' t know what awaits us. I don't know if the world will ever stay this peaceful, chances are they won't. When something happens I know he'll rise to the call of duty again. When that happens I will just have to be his lucky charm. We love each other, and as long as we have this, I don't have to be afraid to be myself anymore.

The End.

-----------------Final Fantasy VII and all related characters are © Square-Enix---------------


End file.
